Email Sent in by Frederick:
What is your favorite dessert? I will make it! What is your favorite place to go? Let us go there together! What is your favorite MANDROID-MANDROID? We can build it together and have a MANDROID-MANDROID in the party circle. My ideal friday night is taking out a canvas and putting whatever we want on it. Anything goes in the art world today. You profile says you are involved in the art world. That means that you might with with galleries. Can you look at me bytes and see if I will be a good fit for your gallery? I can do any kind of art. You think about it and I will make it. Sorry time to to fill MANDROID-MANDROID.
From,
Bill
10/22/2016
10/21/2016
I Can Guess
Story Sent in by Laura:
I was out in a park with Tim on a first date when he asked me if I liked guys in boxers, briefs, or boxer-briefs. I told him that boxers and boxer-briefs were my preference.
He then went behind a pine tree, pulled down his pants, and I saw (it was a thin pine tree) that he had on a pair of briefs over a pair of boxer-briefs over a pair of boxers. He took off the briefs, tossed them on the ground, pulled his pants back up, stuffed the briefs into his pocket, and returned to me as if nothing at all was weird.
"Just in case," he told me.
In case of what? I couldn't guess. After a quick coffee I had "someplace to be" and ended the date.
I was out in a park with Tim on a first date when he asked me if I liked guys in boxers, briefs, or boxer-briefs. I told him that boxers and boxer-briefs were my preference.
He then went behind a pine tree, pulled down his pants, and I saw (it was a thin pine tree) that he had on a pair of briefs over a pair of boxer-briefs over a pair of boxers. He took off the briefs, tossed them on the ground, pulled his pants back up, stuffed the briefs into his pocket, and returned to me as if nothing at all was weird.
"Just in case," he told me.
In case of what? I couldn't guess. After a quick coffee I had "someplace to be" and ended the date.
Labels:
Stories,
Written by a Girl
10/20/2016
The Importance of Being Nothing Important
Story Sent in by Edward:
At a first date dinner with Laura, she showed me lots of photos of her most recent ex. She said she was over him and then in the next breath she asked me if I thought she was dating again too soon.
I did my best to advise her while all the while knowing that this wasn't going to move beyond a first date. I told her it sounded like she wasn't really over him and that she should maybe take her time with it before going out with people.
She then pulled out her phone and actually called the guy up. They had a brief, awkward chat. I wondered if she had been in touch with him at all since the breakup. She looked me right in the eye when she told him that she wasn't up to anything important. Then she asked him when she could see him again.
Apparently he said, "Right now," because she put some money on the table, gave me a parting glance, and left while still on the phone and without a goodbye. She didn't even text me to apologize for her rudeness. I have no idea if she got back together with him. At least everything worked out for one of us.
At a first date dinner with Laura, she showed me lots of photos of her most recent ex. She said she was over him and then in the next breath she asked me if I thought she was dating again too soon.
I did my best to advise her while all the while knowing that this wasn't going to move beyond a first date. I told her it sounded like she wasn't really over him and that she should maybe take her time with it before going out with people.
She then pulled out her phone and actually called the guy up. They had a brief, awkward chat. I wondered if she had been in touch with him at all since the breakup. She looked me right in the eye when she told him that she wasn't up to anything important. Then she asked him when she could see him again.
Apparently he said, "Right now," because she put some money on the table, gave me a parting glance, and left while still on the phone and without a goodbye. She didn't even text me to apologize for her rudeness. I have no idea if she got back together with him. At least everything worked out for one of us.
Labels:
Stories,
Written by a Guy
10/19/2016
So Breitbart's Hiring?
Story Sent in by Eileen:
When I met up with Damon in person after he found me online, he asked me if I'd be up for a quick dinner. When I asked him why it needed to be quick he said that he had a surprise for me afterward.
He had a laptop bag with him and he took me to a really cheap, rundown diner for some gross food. My burger looked more like a meat puddle than a burger.
As for his surprise, he then brought me to a Kinko's and opened up his bag. He pulled out several sheets of paper with charts and reports on them. He said, "I'm copying off 600 of these. I need you to staple them."
That was his surprise. Me helping him staple. Before I could say no, he said, "I did just pay for dinner so maybe you can help for just a little while? We can quit after a bit. I just need to get most of these done."
I asked him, "Don't the copiers have an auto-staple function?"
He laughed. "Yeah, but it always does it wrong. I need the human touch."
He started making copies. I was able to glance at his report-things and they were utter nonsense. There was a paragraph about the environment then a paragraph about Obama then a paragraph about the L.A. Dodgers then a paragraph about fire safety. And his charts and graphs were even worse. They plotted things like the usage of cornmeal alongside how close Mars was to Earth during its orbit.
After about 15 minutes of helping, I became really bored and asked him if we could finish up soon.
"Finish up? We just started! We have hundreds to go!"
I said, "Then I'll probably go soon. I'm sorry. I didn't want to copy, tonight."
He said, "I'll tell my boss you didn't help. But fine. Whatever."
His boss, whoever it was, wasn't my boss. If that was all Damon had to threaten me with then I felt it was worth the risk. I left.
He wrote me an email that night to tell me that he had phoned his boss and that said boss wasn't at all pleased with me.
When I met up with Damon in person after he found me online, he asked me if I'd be up for a quick dinner. When I asked him why it needed to be quick he said that he had a surprise for me afterward.
He had a laptop bag with him and he took me to a really cheap, rundown diner for some gross food. My burger looked more like a meat puddle than a burger.
As for his surprise, he then brought me to a Kinko's and opened up his bag. He pulled out several sheets of paper with charts and reports on them. He said, "I'm copying off 600 of these. I need you to staple them."
That was his surprise. Me helping him staple. Before I could say no, he said, "I did just pay for dinner so maybe you can help for just a little while? We can quit after a bit. I just need to get most of these done."
I asked him, "Don't the copiers have an auto-staple function?"
He laughed. "Yeah, but it always does it wrong. I need the human touch."
He started making copies. I was able to glance at his report-things and they were utter nonsense. There was a paragraph about the environment then a paragraph about Obama then a paragraph about the L.A. Dodgers then a paragraph about fire safety. And his charts and graphs were even worse. They plotted things like the usage of cornmeal alongside how close Mars was to Earth during its orbit.
After about 15 minutes of helping, I became really bored and asked him if we could finish up soon.
"Finish up? We just started! We have hundreds to go!"
I said, "Then I'll probably go soon. I'm sorry. I didn't want to copy, tonight."
He said, "I'll tell my boss you didn't help. But fine. Whatever."
His boss, whoever it was, wasn't my boss. If that was all Damon had to threaten me with then I felt it was worth the risk. I left.
He wrote me an email that night to tell me that he had phoned his boss and that said boss wasn't at all pleased with me.
Labels:
Stories,
Written by a Girl
10/18/2016
Tough Omelets
Story Sent in by Manuel:
I had a really fun first date out with Constance. She had a couple of drinks and we never ran out of stuff to talk about. It grew late, I started to grow tired, and I was ready to head home. We took a brief walk around the block and she asked me, "Want to go back to your place?"
That woke me up. We went back to my house where I thought we'd proceed with some action but when we entered she made a beeline for my couch, flopped down onto it, said, "Don't touch me," and went right to sleep.
All right, then. I covered her with a sheet and went to bed, myself. There was no touching of her.
She was still there in the morning. Her first words to me when she woke up was, "What's for breakfast?"
I offered her eggs, toast, juice, and so on. She asked for a big omelet, I made one, she wolfed it down, then immediately left my place without so much as a thank-you. And so that was the last I saw of her.
I had a really fun first date out with Constance. She had a couple of drinks and we never ran out of stuff to talk about. It grew late, I started to grow tired, and I was ready to head home. We took a brief walk around the block and she asked me, "Want to go back to your place?"
That woke me up. We went back to my house where I thought we'd proceed with some action but when we entered she made a beeline for my couch, flopped down onto it, said, "Don't touch me," and went right to sleep.
All right, then. I covered her with a sheet and went to bed, myself. There was no touching of her.
She was still there in the morning. Her first words to me when she woke up was, "What's for breakfast?"
I offered her eggs, toast, juice, and so on. She asked for a big omelet, I made one, she wolfed it down, then immediately left my place without so much as a thank-you. And so that was the last I saw of her.
Labels:
Stories,
Written by a Guy
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Content Policy