Swing and a Kiss

Story Sent in by Bernard:

My first date with Lindsey was supposed to be a walk and a coffee, just the two of us alone. She brought her little boy with her and carried him as we strolled. I guess it was okay but she kept kissing him over and over. Kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss kiss. It was to excess. A kiss a second, and that's no exaggeration:

"So Lindsey, how's work?"

"Well" *kiss* "I" *kiss* "like" *kiss* "it" *kiss* "there" *kiss* "but" *kiss* "I" *kiss* "am" *kiss* "looking" *kiss* "for" *kiss* "something" *kiss* "else" *kiss*

"What are you looking for?"

"Oh" *kiss* "just" *kiss* "something" *kiss* "in" *kiss* "nursing" *kiss* "or" *kiss* "whatever" *kiss* "I" *kiss* "can" *kiss* "find" *kiss*

It drove me insane. The smacking of her lips. The saliva all over her poor kid's head. It became revolting. After a few more minutes of the non-stop kissing I had to leave. Because it was so soon after we met up I had no choice but to be honest when she asked me why I had to go so soon. I said, "I'm just not feeling this. Sorry."

"Why" *kiss* "not?" *kiss* "We" *kiss* "barely" *kiss* "spoke" *kiss*

I didn't answer her immediately and she kept kissing and kissing her kid's head. I said, "I'm sorry. I can't," and I just left. I felt bad and still do, but I couldn't take another minute of that stupidity, much less five minutes, an hour, or another date.


  1. I bet if she were kissing and getting slobber all over your head, it would have been a different story all together.

    1. That's how she ended up with that kid in the first place...

  2. Her kids come first, OP. I'm sure her Match profile made that abundantly clear, about 6-10 times...

    1. I know a lot of women for whom their kids come first but who are still able to speak in full sentences, yes, even say multiple of them without having to kiss their kid.

  3. Maybe you shouldn’t date moms


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