4/22/2010

Lab Rats

Submitted by Gerald:

Helen was a graduate student who worked in a bio lab next to mine. We had chatted on occasion, but didn't have much of a chance for interaction.

One day, when I was waiting for some results, she stopped by and we had a really great conversation. I ended up asking her out, and she went for it, with the caveat that we stop back in the lab after dinner so that she could check on an experiment.

Dinner went great, and we were totally grooving on each other. When we went back to her lab, she sat herself up on one of the lab tables, pulled me close, and kissed me like she was plumbing my very depths.

I climbed on top of her and she cringed. She said, "Gently."

My position was awkward, so I stepped back off of her for a second to readjust, and I must I've jostled the table, since an experiment setup on the lab bench next to ours toppled and shattered on the tile floor.

She shot up in an instant. "You idiot!" she yelled, "Do you have any idea what you just did?"

I didn't, although I had a feeling that it might have been something bad.

Turns out, the experiment I had destroyed wasn't some sort of mutated virus, but a setup that had been running for about 10 days straight. Whoops.

I stammered apology after apology, but she wasn't listening. All I could do was help her clean up. After we had most of it mopped, she told me to go. I asked her if she was sure, and she said that she was.

My bad for being a klutz, I guess. Still, we both should've reconsidered messing around inside of the lab, although I can't lie — something about it still turns me on.

36 comments:

  1. Her bad, dude, not yours!

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  2. This is why I am glad my research involved optics tables. That shit is screwed on and the table is designed to minimize vibrations.

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  3. Come on up to the lab....and see what's on the slab. Got to be careful Gerald, she could have been a sweet transvestite, from Transsexual Transylvania.

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  4. Both of your bads... If it were my experiment that I'd been running for 10 days, and both of you ruined it because you can't seem to control your hormones, I'd have poisoned you both.

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  5. Speaking of hormones, 12:49, it would've been funnier if it happened in my lab- reproductive endocrinology.

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  6. I have the impression over time reading these comments that there is acutally a sizeable population of scientists in this site's fan base. Can we get a poll?

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  7. OP had no way of knowing there was a valuable research proiject going on, and it was obvioulsy a mistake... She shouldn't have brought you there in teh first place if she couldn't handle the risks.

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  8. @ Architect. I think I might have been the only one to get your reference.

    LOVE IT!!

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  9. grooving on each other?

    Am i too young or too old to not have used this word before?

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  10. @3:33 Arguably THE biggest cult film ever, that's been running for pretty much the 35 years since it came out and you think you are the only one that got it? Um, no. That's sweet, but think you need to get out more.

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  11. I'm with Erron. If you didn't catch the reference, you clearly don't watch movies.

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  12. I would take girls to have sex in the LHC (and yes, that is my area of research).

    Scientists rule!

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  13. not a scientists, but an engineer. thats pretty close right? i do stuff in labs all the time. often fantasized about having sex in one too haha :)

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  14. haha, I knew that reference YEARS before I had even seen the movie...

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  15. Physicist here! our equipment is usually pretty heavy and screwed in to the floor or table - but its also some of the most expensive equipment so the stakes are higher.

    Oh, and if you lose even a fraction of a gram of the wrong radioactive material, that's your job gone, right there.

    .........on the other hand - danger sex!

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  16. Biologist here...never tried fooling around in our lab facility - it might be the scrubs/hair bonnets/booties/masks, or it might be all those little rodent eyes watching!

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  17. ^ Mmm, voyeur-rat sex!

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  18. @ 3:33 You're pretty special, aren't you? No one has ever seen that film before. Not like it runs on Friday/Saturday nights in most cities with reenactments, nope.

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  19. Good pickup, Fizziks. I've often had that notion, too, but not in such a complete thought. :p

    Computational physicist here.

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  20. Another physicist here! Even better: medical physicist, so that translates to hospital sex.

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  21. physicist here too! Imagine that, not a plumber or janitor in the bunch! We am smert!

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  22. Whowzha - we need a reunion! Anyone feel like a roadtrip? I vote tour of particle accelerator

    http://www1.jlab.org/ul/calendar/calendar_main.cfm

    And, just this once we'll allow our sworn enemies, the engineers ;)

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  23. ^ How do you feel about architects ;-)

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  24. @Architect - screw you, glorified construction worker! ;D

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  25. @ anon 3:58 PM i didn't catch the refernce so that means i don't watch movies???? um how about i'm 20 years old and therefore i am not an old geezer to even know that movie lol

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  26. Civil servant. Should have been an interior designer though. Astronomy and Human Anatomy were some of the best classes I took at college. Did anyone catch Bodies the Exhibit when it came around. Wicked fun.

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  27. Software engineer here...

    Maybe it's the math / science types that just don't get many dates, so we glorify in reading about others' bad ones? Or maybe we just have the extra time in front of a computer to stop by and read?

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  28. Ohhhhhhhhhh man, I'm the odd duck out. Theatre major, going to grad school next year to teach theatre. But! I date a biologist! Does that count?

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  29. ^ No. Leave our club immediately. Leave the beer. And the condoms...

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  30. ...You DO realize that theatre people are some of the easiest people on the planet, right?

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  31. Yep. That's why I don't sleep with them. They've probably got AIDS.

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  32. Really Nikki? I know my disappointment doesn't count for much, but yikes.

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  33. ^ They're called "Injuns." And you misspelled "teh gheys." Jeez, doesn't anyone even TRY to be politically correct now-a-days?

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  34. Sorry to disappoint, Fizziks, but I couldn't resist. I don't always follow my nobler impulses when it comes to this site. :P

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  35. It's probably just the AIDS.

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  36. Biologist here, specializing in conjugation and transduction of archaebacteria. Meaning: I would have tracked down the perpetrator and infected them with smallpox.

    Anyway, geek-rage aside, she should have known better. Shit luck OP.

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