3/07/2010

A Female, Dear

Submitted by Terry:

Luckily, I found out quick that Kelly was nuts.  We were at an early dinner, and on the subject of her vegetarianism.  I brought up the fact that I had gone on a hunting trip when I was much younger.  I had killed a deer.  It wasn't something I had ever done since, but it happened, and I don't regret it.

She flew off the handle when I told her that.  You'd have thought that I had killed her entire family and then hacked off each of her limbs only to reattach them in different, funny places around her body.

"That deer could have been a mother!" she said.

I informed her that it was a buck, not a doe.  That made her madder and she said, "You killed an innocent animal, point being."

I reminded her that this had occurred when I was about 12 or so, I hadn't sought to do it since, and that it was legal.  She asked me if I even felt bad about it, and I told her that I did, a little.

"A little?  You slaughtered an innocent!"

At this point, I had to wonder if she was joking and I asked her point blank, "Are you joking?"

"No!" she said, and followed it with, "And I don't date murderers.  Sorry."

"That's fine.  I don't date people who harp on something I did before I was a teenager."

That killed the conversation, as you can imagine.  We finished our dinners as quickly as possible and she said a curt goodbye.

41 comments:

  1. i hate vegetarians

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  2. Yes, she overreacted, but why did you bring it up? Just to push her buttons?

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  3. I hate vegetarians too! I actually had to stop being friends with one because she became vegan, got way militant, fed her CAT (a carnivore) a vegan diet, killed the cat because of this (again, cats are carnivores!), and then blamed this result on the "industrial-military complex". There is something about a lack of protein that slowly drives veggies to insanity.

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  4. Anon 10:07: I'm a vegetarian, but I think that people who put their cats or dogs on a meat-free diet are insane. It's not healthy for them and like you said, they were meant to eat meat. I dated a man for years who owned a cattle ranch and had some of the finest, grain fed beef free of hormones and crap. We got along because we respected each others choices. The girl on this date should have kept her mouth shut. She went way overboard! I don't like hunting either, but I don't think her date needed a lecture. Besides, you can't rewrite history!

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  5. Anon 10:07: I'm a vegetarian, but I think that people who put their cats or dogs on a meat-free diet are insane. It's not healthy for them and like you said, they were meant to eat meat. I dated a man for years who owned a cattle ranch and had some of the finest, grain fed beef free of hormones and crap. We got along because we respected each others choices. The girl on this date should have kept her mouth shut. She went way overboard! I don't like hunting either, but I don't think her date needed a lecture. Besides, you can't rewrite history!

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  6. You should have pushed her buttons some more. "Yeah, poor Bambi bled to death in front of me, from a gushing neck wound, pulsing blood at every beat of her dying heart. Her eyes looked into mine, and I saw the light in them extinguish as she took her last breath. It gave me a sexual thrill, and I often masturbate to the memories."

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  7. I'm a woman and I hunt deer. Vegetarians love to personify animals and they usually don't have much of a grasp on reality. They really fly of the handle when others are not impressed by their lifestyle. They think of themselves as morally superior and want to be admired. It's a central part of their identities.

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  8. Gee, thanks for all the stereotyping today, guys. Nice to know that all vegetarians are irrational arrogant idiots. :-/

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  9. Most of the people who are vegetarians only become vegetarians because it makes them feel superior to other people, not because of any actual belief. When a vegetarian can't feel superior to another vegetarian that person becomes a vegan ("the beginning and end of vegetarianism".) When vegans can't feel superior to other people they become militant assholes.

    We have deer overpopulation problems here because we killed all of our wolves. Lots of deer live shitty lives and starve because there are too many of them. Hunting them is a kindness.

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  10. I eat meat, but I have to come to vegetarians' defense here. Most of the ones I've known are perfectly respectful of my choices. They also tend to be relatively ok with hunting and more against industrial-size slaughterhouses that treat animals very poorly.

    They spend a lot less time 'feeling superior' than do people who stereotype and bash vegetarian lifestyle choices.

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  11. You can say much the same things about hunters, Anon 11:33. They have a seriously poor grasp of reality, in that they seem to be unsure of the century they are living in. They totally fly off the handle when others are not impressed by their lifestyles and refuse to admire them, they are morally superior about hunting and they consider hunting a central part of their identities. Overall, they like to demonize anyone who isn't awed by their lifestyle choice. Hunting, big deal; wrestle one of those deer to the ground and strangle it to death, THEN I'll be impressed.

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  12. Hunters are so stupid that they need to wear orange vests to keep from shooting each other.

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  13. No, that's not right. It's not because they're stupid that they wear the orange vests, it's because they're so drunk.

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  14. The hunters I know are better educated and more successful then the hippie vegetarians I know. There are stereotypes about both groups, but the hunters have more of an undertanding of how animals actually are. Animals are not people. They are not fluffy cute little innocent stand ins for humans. You rarely see vegetarians in the rural place where I live unless they are transplants from the city who think he movie Bambi is based on reality. I hike and I've seen starved deer in the woods. I would way rather someone shoot it and eat it then it get torn apart by coyotes (a slow death vs a bullet) or starve. The whole vegetarian thing is designed to make people feel all warm and fuzzy about nature and themselves. It's not how nature actually works.

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  15. I'm a meatitarian myself. It's a choice, really.

    But when my girlfriend tried a more Vegan-ish diet for a few weeks, I didn't give her any crap about murdering innocent vegetables just as she didn't criticize me for eating delicious, yummy animals!

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  16. Mmmmmmm...venison. NOTHING is TASTIER than young deer. Sorry Bambi, but you is delish!

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  17. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z3Z9cjKkqn4&feature=related

    I never got married because I like meat too much.

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  18. @ 8:17

    I've never met a hunter who had a college degree. And I know a lot of hunters. Just saying.

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  19. I hunt the most dangerous game: HUMAN

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  20. @ 8:17 is about as full of it as an Internet poster can be, and that is saying something.

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  21. 8:17 you contradict yourself. what is more natural, the coyote eating the deer, or someone shooting it?

    hunting is designed to make people feel warm and fuzzy about their guns. its not how nature actually works. be a man and go wrestle that bear by hand boy!

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  22. 12:02, my father hunts quite often. He's a pharmacist, and goes hunting with a few other doctors every couple months. And 1:40, just because someone has experienced something different doesn't mean they're full of shit. Why not grow up a little bit and stop jumping to conclusions?

    Point is, vegetarians who preach about how bad it is to eat animals are annoying. They're pushing an agenda on people who have no care for it. Hunters who make a big deal about going out and shooting things are probably going to be just as annoying to people who don't hunt. Bottom line, everyone annoys everyone always. Nothing will change that.

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  23. 3:06 on the other hand, vegetarianism is a way for people to feel warm and fuzzy about how they're not hurting the precious little animals. Be a man and go rescue some cattle!

    Also, what's unnatural about humans eating meat? Who cares the way we kill it, we still kill it and eat it. That sounds like what the animals do too, after all.

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  24. I love it when folks insinuate that people are not animals...

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  25. Wow 10:15, just wow, you think human beings are for some reason superior to everything else because we say so? You should know that Dolphins, chimpanzees and gorillas to name a small number of animals can cogitate and reason, just because most of mankind has better technology than the rest of the animal kingdom does not separate us from it, anyway, what about remote african tribes that hunt or even (To the extreme I admit) children raised in animal communities?

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  26. 11:39, no I think we're better than animals because we can walk around, speak and can drive cars. Dolphins, chimpanzees and gorillas cannot truly cogitate either you complete fool. It means to think deeply about a problem. None of those animals think deeply about problems, they react out of instinct. They can think, but they think about their next meal or sex, not about why the sun rises and sets.

    And it's not just because we have better technology that we're better than the animals (though it helps). For one, evolution has crafted our brains to be just flat-out superior to the animal mind. Monkeys can understand sign language, but only after a number of pavlovian responses have been drilled into their brains. Our use of technology DOES separate us from animals completely. I mean, that combined with things like culture. NO other animal (except chimpanzees, to retrieve certain foods) even has a concept of how to USE complex tools. If that doesn't separate us from the animal kingdom then I don't know what does.

    As for the African tribes hunting children, that's got to be the weakest strawman argument I've ever seen. First of all, calling tribal people animals because of cultural practices they've been doing for generations makes you seem like a bit of an ass. Second of all, taking a remote tribe in the vast expanses of Africa and pointing out one tradition they practice doesn't really prove that humans are animals at all. In fact, they probably use weapons and live in houses anyway. That still puts them a step above animals, even if we don't add in the fact that they have a culture and language and everything.

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  27. Hey 12:38, you know chimpanzees have been taught to drive cars? octopi can operate complex machinery and solve puzzles to get food.. I could go on, the point is that we are not some kind of special better than everything race. (Because we can walk around... there are other bipedal animals!) And animals such as gorillas communicate with advanced facial expressions and utterances, whales have their 'songs' similar to dolphin clicks that have been shown to be a language of it's own! enough points refuted for you?
    I shall say that yes that does describe some animals but there are those that recognise individual humans and become attached to them and did you know elephants mourn their babies and herd member s when they die and cry? they feel love, pain, loneliness, anger and a whole spectrum of emotions.
    On the point of beauty and why the sun rises and sets, I can't answer that, until we can speak with the animals we can ask them then because who knows.
    (Fun fact: pigs have a far superior memory than humans, google it, there's a video experiment on youtube)
    Surely this is all semantics anyway, arguing the use and meaning of words, I could agree that humans are (In some ways) superior animals and indeed have complex tools and culture but in the animal kingdom nonetheless as we are in the great evolutionary tree of life.

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  28. 12:57, just because a couple individual animals when put in a lab setting are taught to operate some devices when trained long enough doesn't mean the species is a bunch of geniuses. After all, parrots can mimic human speech, and that doesn't make them special. They can just mimic. I've seen a guinea pig trained to recognize colors and bring the right colored ball when asked. The point is that these are tricks. They are things we've gotten animals to do when we stick them in a box long enough to learn how it's done. As for communication, how does animals communicating like, well, animals prove anything? Whales sing to other whales? Well, all animals make noises at each other to communicate. That's kind of the point of a dog bark. Bipedalism doesn't prove anything either. Birds are bipedal, and they're dumb as fuck.

    Feeling a sense of loss proves nothing either. ALL things notice when something is missing. ALL animals feel some level of loss when their environment changes. Really, this whole "animals feel feelings" argument is trying to prove that animals are the same as humans. However, just feeling things isn't really enough to bump you past animal intelligence. All things feel emotions, even birds. And birds are dumb as fuck.

    In the end, a lot of this is just tricks you've mentioned, or once again another strawman argument about how animals really feel feelings too. Well, the fact still remains that we're the only creatures even near to our realm of intelligence. Sure, animals can learn tricks, but they're tricks, not any real sign of human intelligence. We are in the same Kingdom as animals, but there's a reason we're not in the same genus as monkeys. We're a step above, clearly.

    ...also birds are dumb as fuck.

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  29. humans ARE animals. we just happen to be on a much higher level intellectually than any other animal on earth, which is quite lucky for us. we once coexisted with other intelligent species, like the neanderthals. at what point do you draw the line between animal and not animal? because evolution was a very slow process. what would you consider a homo habilus, or homo erectus?

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  30. I think anon 10:15, 11:17, 12:38, 1:20 (all the same miserable person) would consider humans in their own category. I'm thinking his/her mind will change when they get older. I'm also assuming they are young in age due to every reply containing at least one insult to whomever they are replying to, and having to go back to define some of the words they use, 'just in case' you didn't know what they were talking about. After all, they can't possibly keep up the "Just because we're in the animal kingdom (and therefor animals), doesn't mean we're animals" forever.

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  31. wait, wait. I am assuming 12:38 and 1:20 are the same person, you stated that humans were special because we walked around and spoke to each other to paraphrase but now bipedalism and animals making noises to each other communicate (Isn't that what speech is?)doesn't make them special?
    Yes trained hamsters are an interesting example, isn't that what human intelligence is? learning and continuing to learn? And not just in lab conditions, in real life.
    Good, we've established an agreement that animals have emotional intelligence. So your point is humans are smart therefore not animals? what about biologically? and are you sure people are so smart? I mean just look at the stupid things people can do, this is especially evident if you've ever worked in retail, it's a wonder half of them can dress themselves!
    My main question would have to be what makes a human being intelligent? what are the signs of human intelligence?
    This line of conversation has been interesting and stimulating by the way, it's nice to see people can have different opinions and discuss without resorting to questioning the others sexual preferences or intelligence. :)

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  32. ^ Yes, I'm a homo, but what does "science talk" have to do with my sexual preferences? Nobody is asking you to read the comments.

    -12:41, 10:53, and 3:12

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  33. i like to read the comments to see what funny things people say, talkin shit about the dates. not two dudes verbally jerkin each other off so a bunch of anonymous people on the internet know how much smarter they are than animals.

    go take your science foreplay somewhere else.

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  34. Now you're just teasing me...

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  35. i had thought that was pretty obvious with the reference to the other vegetarian story on here, the blatantly unnecessary use of derogatory words, and the over all snarky tone. ;p

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  36. Wow. As someone with a degree in Animal Science and currently studying animal behavior at the graduate level with all of the fascinating quirks and intricacies of animal thought, feeling and communication, I have to say that it is rare to find someone as wildly inaccurate as 10:15/11:17/12:38/1:20. Even on an internet level of pompous-but-completely-wrong, it's still impressive.

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  37. we are all obviously very impressed, 3:06.

    I agree with 11:32, the whole post but especially this part: "go take your science foreplay somewhere else."

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  38. Oh internet, only you can transform a somewhat humorous story of date gone bad due to differing lifestyle choices and turn it into knee-jerk potshots AT those differing lifestyle choices...

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  39. I'm veggy and wouldn't care if my date had hunted once. Hell, I wouldn't care if they STILL hunted so long as they weren't just leaving the carcasses to rot. If you kill it, use it or have someone else use it. The OP was still a dumbass. "You're really against something? Well, I am fine with doing it for fun". I would have just been like "Oh, that's nice" rather than "OMG you kill animals!", but it was still a stupid thing to say. How could it possibly go over well?

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  40. I tend to roll my eyes at the fruit and nuts who object to other people eating meat. Oh, and I just think vegans are silly.

    But I'm not sure the best way to respond to a factual statement such as "I don't eat meat" is saying "I once shot a deer!"

    Doesn't take a genius to figure that out.

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