Submitted by Maggie:
I met Patrick while tailgating at a college football game. His older brother was a good friend of my sister's and he was kind of cute. My sister eventually gave me his e-mail and we emailed for a little bit. Then, it turned into talking on the phone and him helping me with some homework.
We decided to go to see a movie in an older, rundown movie theater because the newer theater in town was packed. He started off by putting his arm around me. Well, okay, that's good for a first date.
He then started whispering all kinds of suggestive things to me that made me pretty uncomfortable.
I didn't respond to anything he said. At one point he attempted to slide a hand into a forbidden zone. After failing in the quest, thanks to my super tight jeans and unwillingness, he gave up.
He then whispered, "I love you," into my hair. Again, I didn't respond. He said again, "I love you." I ignored him again.
He then reached his hand over to again touch me in an inappropriate place. I pushed his hand off and returned to the movie. This all occurred within the first thirty minutes of the movie.
The ride back to my car was uncomfortable. He asked me several times what was wrong, as I was not saying anything to him. I never called him again.
Talk about not taking a hint :)
ReplyDeleteYou shouldn't have ignored him though - tell him the first time he's moving to fast, if that doesn't work, leave.
I also have to wonder why you stayed - although I doubt it was necessary for anon #1 to insult you for it.
ReplyDeleteThe second he tried anything more than the arm around you should have been cause for you to bolt.
Seriously, you should never have gotten into the car with him to go home. The police would have gladly given you a ride.
ReplyDeleteThat's rape.
WTF is with young girls not knowing how to protect themselves on a date? ASSERT YOURSELF! Tell him "NO" and if he doesn't get it, GET SECURITY. I agree with everyone who posted above: you should have reported him immediately and gotten another ride home. And tell your sister, who could tell his older brother, who could knock some fucking sense into this asshole.
ReplyDeleteWe as a nation are obviously failing our young women if shit like this happens all the time, and the only thing the young woman thinks to do about the situation is post a story about it on a "bad dates" website.
@ anon 1 & 5. i do not condone this man's actions, but what he did was not rape or even attempted rape. rape is the act of forced sexual intercourse. this was at worst sexual misconduct, but i doubt that it was even that. maggie, in the future do not just sit there and say nothing, make your intentions abundently clear.
ReplyDeleteI agree its not rape, but it isnt simply misconduct. It was at least sexual abuse. Not sure why the OP didnt get out of there right away, but I'm sure she's learned that lesson. Don't beat up on her too bad folks.
ReplyDeleteTrue, not rape. However, left alone, it is almost guaranteed that this boy will rape in the future.
ReplyDeleteA woman who is treated this way needs to proceed as if it were rape, otherwise she is putting herself at risk, as this one did.
He'll likely pull it out for the wrong girl someday, who'll then pull it out herself.
ReplyDelete...but....but....but....he did say he LOVED you....mwahaha.
ReplyDeletethis girl sounds frigid! You know she probably liked it.
ReplyDeletehe pulled out his weiner...and you stayed for the ENTIRE movie?? What??
ReplyDeletemonkeys are cool
ReplyDeleteI don't think that it was rape...just a sad story about a boy and his monkey...
ReplyDeleteNo it wasn't rape but he is definitely someone who needs to be put in his place...why did you let him drive you home? Purchase some mace or bear spray. It's not difficult to use.
ReplyDeleteUmm, maybe it was a really good movie and she wanted to see how it ended???
ReplyDeleteseriously though: ya should've run or told him to F-off.
You so should've walked out. He was beyond creepy and weird and eeww.
ReplyDelete1) Definitely not rape
ReplyDelete2) I don't know if you could even consider this as sexual misconduct. Imagine trying to argue this point in court...she never said "no", she didn't leave, she didn't call for help, she even left with him. Not exactly a victim here.
Sorry to the OP, but even though he is a pervert, you don't seem mature enough to start dating with out a chaperon yet. Stick to group outings for now.
OMG....
ReplyDeletethis is NOT rape... it isnt right, either. But he was trying to get what he wanted. DId u ever say no? no. He probably just thought u wanted it but were shy or something.. u never said a word and never attempted to leave.
Shame on u both... more on u than him... and security for what? She didnt even try... were you sure of what you wanted and didnt want?
This is a man who just can't think any higher than what people do with their "lowers"
ReplyDeleteHoney, if the movie was that good, you could have at least transferred to another seat...somewhere where the seats on either side of you would be occupied so he can't just follow you and sit with you again...
ReplyDelete