8/02/2017

A House Is Not a Home

Story Sent in by Renee:

Jack was pretty adamant about me going over to his apartment for our first date. Uh... no. So we "compromised" and planned to meet at a bar & grill. Not long after I arrived and went inside he texted me to meet him in the rear parking lot.

When I made it there, I found he had parked away from everyone else and taken over three parking spaces with a couch, an entertainment center, a TV, a bookshelf with a few books, and a standing lamp. He said, "Since you wouldn't come over to my place, my place has come to you! Have a seat." He motioned at his tiny couch.

I guess I had to hand it to him for effort and creativity. I sat down on his couch and he sat right next to me and pretended to watch the unplugged TV for about half a minute before he started copping a feel.

I stood up and told him that I was going. He yelled about how much effort it was to bring everything over there for me and that the least I could do was help him pack everything up and bring it back to his apartment.

Nothing doing. Adios.

8 comments:

  1. *Jack talking to himself*
    Damn it, that didn't work. Ok, for the next date, I'm going with plan B.

    ReplyDelete
  2. This is what happens when you only have ONE move...

    ReplyDelete
  3. This is a man dedicated to getting laid, and he's definitely NOT going about it right. He's toeing the line between very determined and rapey.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Was it the grope that put him in the rapey camp? It was the grope wasn't it?

      Delete
    2. I was gonna say that freaky standing lamp, but I guess the grope, too.

      Delete
  4. He motioned at his tiny couch...

    Hmmmm. Tiny couch. Hmmmm.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I'm not a size queen but...

    ReplyDelete

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