What's Upchuck?

Story Sent in by John:

When I was out to dinner with Jo, she complained of a sour stomach. She had mentioned it before we ate and I asked her if she wanted to go home or maybe grab an antacid from a pharmacy. She turned me down on all fronts and so I let her know that if she needed to leave at any point, it was all right with me.

Shortly after the food arrived she left the table for a little while. When she came back she looked pale but she said, "I feel a lot better. I threw up."

I again told her, "You really don't have to stay out if you're not feeling well."

She insisted on sticking around for the meal. The bill came, we split it, and then she seemed in a big hurry to leave before me. I guessed that she still wasn't feeling 100%. We had driven there separately and so I'm she she found her way back to her car and drove herself home with no problem.

When I made it back to my car, I found that someone had puked all over the hood. I instantly thought of Jo, then told myself it had to be a coincidence. But I texted her to ask her, joking at first, "Did you throw up on my hood? Because someone puked all over it. :)"

In response, she texted me back a photo of my hood covered in puke. Putting the pieces together, I realized that not only did she puke on my car, she had actually taken a photo of the deed for some reason. I asked her, "Why would you do that?"

She didn't reply. First and last date.


  1. Jo likes to leave each of her dates with a little something extra.

  2. Marking one's territory is a common practice in some cultures. Awww, she liked you, OP!

  3. What skeleton is in John's placard? It looks like a very elaborate plan to mess with his car and needed an immense amount of preparation in order to get some sort of revenge.


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