Yes. Let's Meat.

(President. Mogul. Film critic? Visit Trump Movie Reviews, my new parody site! Do share! -JMG)

Email Sent in by Tomas:

Hey boytoy.

You are a great looking guy. Love the photo of you on the beach. I might make it my wallpapers! Anyhoo have you seen Silents of the lambs? You remind me of the guy in that film when he wears the skin of all those ladies. That is you remind me of the skin. Not of the guy. I'm nt saying I want to see you without skin but I do want to see your skin on not just you but on that guy maybe. I am Craig and I don't like long introductions so hopefully you like what I've written here -not exactly poetry-and we can meet.



  1. Leatherface trying out Tinder?His chainsaw will be his only toy if he doesn't stop treating potential dates like pieces of meat.

  2. Chunky Horse is jealous and angry. No one mentioned him for weeks now. And then, a story of killer freak that is not about him!

    1. I get yelled at when I invoke His name too often... 😥

    2. Not invoking his name enough might bring consequences worse than yelling!

    3. Chunky Horse doesn't wish to become an old tired running gag, but he doesn't want to be forgotten, or replaced, either.

    4. I've now been singing that in the Old Jewish Man's voice for the last half an hour. Thanks so much. My coworkers sincerely appreciate it.

  3. I feel like Craig is making a lot of understatements in this message...


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