Story Sent in by Mort:

Terri and I were having a first date dinner at a steakhouse when she took two kernels off of her corn-on-the-cob and plugged her nostrils with them.

"Nose plugs!" she said to me, proudly.

I nodded and silently wished for her to remove them from her nose as soon as possible. Instead, she kept them in. We chatted for a minute or two until I couldn't really take it anymore (was she five or 25?) and asked her to remove them from her nostrils.

She exhaled sharply from her nose. One of them shot out, onto the table. The other was lodged in pretty well and so she had to snort out again. It came loose that time.

"Popcorn!" she said.

Ha ha. Yeah. Last date.


  1. This chick was clearly down for a good cornholing.

    Was that too corny?

  2. If she had big bewbs, I'd still hit it... Corn wouldn't be the only thing stuffing all manner of orifices that night...

  3. What did she do for a living? I'm sure she wasn't a kernel in the military.

  4. I'm sure Mort is the heart and soul of any party. With such a name...

  5. So thats what happened to Mort from Discworld............

  6. She needs to set her sights higher than corn-in-the-nose if she wants to be exstrawdinary. She just needs to find her strawberries, because OP didn't get it.


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