What to Doo

Email Sent in by Clara:

Hi beautiful.

Ohhhhhhh by you are beautiful. I want to take you for a walk in the rainforest by my house and enjoy te walk together. Beautiful flowers will sprout at your feet and birds will land on your shoulders. No a bird pooed on your shoulder. I will wipe it away all clean. No another bird landed and pooed again. Why are we walking in this forest with the pooing birds? I think we should leave. No the birds are coming behind us. Run. I will save myself you will save yourself and we will leave the forest and run to dinner.

At dinner will order bird to eat. Dead bird so all done doing what birds do. We will eat and then go back to the forest and poo at the birds so they will know what it is like. You are beautiful and I will give you your privacy.

I am a paralegal during the days. Tell me later what you want to do.



  1. (shaking head) It's another of my least favorite fetishes to know about -- he wrote a lame story around wanting to watch his date poop. This fetish still confounds me.

  2. He went from a Disney movie, to some Sarah Silverman stand-up, to Hitchcock's Birds, and then to some weird scene that reminds me of Silence of the Lambs.


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