10/29/2014

Get Realpolitik

Story Sent in by Ned:

I'm politically active. At one point, I even decided to run for a city councilman position and I mentioned that in my profile.

I took Patty out to dinner for our our first date. After some conversation she asked me, "Do you think you'll be mayor someday?"

I do have a day job that I'd likely prefer to full-time politicking. I told her, "Maybe someday, but just being on the council would be great."

"Yeah, but there's all the prestige of being an actual mayor. There's nothing like that for councilmen."

"I wouldn't be running for prestige. I'd want to make the town a better place."

"Once you're mayor," she said, "you'll need a mayor's wife. And you're not married?"

"Hence this date."

"You know, in recent years, mayors' spouses have become more and more powerful in lots of circles."

"Which circles?"

"You're gonna be mayor. And a mayor needs a wife. Who was the last single mayor you can remember?"

I knew of two offhand. One had never been married and the other had twice divorced before he was elected. I'm sure there were others. When I mentioned these two examples to Patty, she dismissed them and said, "I want to be a mayor's wife. And you're the closest out of everyone I know to being mayor. Think we can arrange something?"

"Like marriage?"

"Why not?" she asked, "I'd be a good mayor's wife."

"What if I'm never mayor? Or never want to be?"

She thought for a few moments then said, "I'm disappointed in your lack of ambition, Edward."

"My name is Ned."

"Ned's a bad name for a mayor, anyway."

She drank down the rest of her wine and perhaps would've ordered another glass had I not suggested that we each pay for ourselves. She played with her gaudy rings for the rest of the meal and there was no second date.

Some time later, I was actually elected deputy mayor. That's as far as my political aspirations have taken me. I heard that Patty moved to St. Louis to pursue theater. So I guess she made it to the public stage after all.

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