Shake, Rattle, and Run

Story Sent in by Lisa:

How could I ever forget Douglas? I was a college sophomore when I met him on one of my courses' online message boards. He somehow charmed me all the way from talk of academics to a first date.

We met face-to-face in front of a classroom building and after giving me a huge hug, he asked, "Want to ride on the roller coaster of risk?"

Before I could ask him to elaborate, he grabbed my shoulders and shook me, like he was shaking sand out of a beach towel.

I pulled away and he froze, gave me a look, then grabbed me and shook me again. "Roller coaster of riiiiiissssk!" he barked.

I yanked away a second time and backed off, out of reach. "Douglas!" I said, "That's enough!"

He put his hands on his hips. "I never thought I'd see the day when anyone would have enough of the roller coaster of risk!"

He reached for me a third time, but I backed off too quickly for him and said, "Douglas! Stop!"

He froze again and said, "Fine."

We went out for a quick coffee, but I was sure to leave right afterward, before he could take me on another amusement park ride.


  1. That was a lame roller coaster ride. He could have at least made it a little more realistic!

  2. That picture looks like the guy is sucking in the soul of the person next to him.

  3. We went out for a quick coffee

    Looks like he shook some brain cells loose. The plan must have been working!

  4. I was going to drop in and make some lame-o comment about their campus cafe giving away free cronuts with the coffee - and then saw The Architect's example of roller coaster realism - and after a day of waiting room appointments past hours and then a dead battery in the car and the usual crap -- had the best laugh of the day. Thank you - and pardon me for complimenting you more than once in a week! I will try not to do it again for a while :P

  5. I can't believe you went through with the date.


Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.

Content Policy

A Bad Case of the Dates reserves the right to publish or not publish any submitted content at any time, and by submitting content to A Bad Case of the Dates, you retain original copyright, but are granting us the right to post, edit, and/or republish your content forever and in any media throughout the universe. If Zeta Reticulans come down from their home planet to harvest bad dating stories, you could become an intergalactic megastar. Go you!

A Bad Case of the Dates is not responsible for user comments. We also reserve the right to delete any comments at any time and for any reason. We're hoping to not have to, though.

Aching to reach us? abadcaseofthedates at gmail dot com.