I Watch it for the Commercials

Story Sent in by Vincent:

Sue was a big football fan. So was/am I, but she was into it beyond most other people I knew. We met a couple of weeks before a Super Bowl and she invited me to a viewing party with her. She spent most of her time at the party jumping up and down, spraying popcorn everywhere, and screaming at the television with a painted face.

After the game was over, she thanked me for bearing with her and she said, "Let's do it again next year, okay?"

I took that to mean that she was interested in something long-term with me. Despite her extreme fanhood for football, I liked her and so I said, "It's a deal."

Not too long after that, we split up and she cut contact. That was okay, and I moved on with my life.

When the next Super Bowl rolled around, though, I had made plans to watch it at a friend's. On my way there, Sue called me. A little surprised to be hearing from her, I picked up.

"Where are you?" she asked.

"On my way to a friend's. For the game."

She said, "Oh. Uh... did you forget our deal or am I the only one who remembered it? We had a deal. We were supposed to hang out today. It's the Super Bowl."

"Yeah. I seem to remember us splitting up."

"Get over here. We promised and I for one keep my promises."

I had no intention of going to wherever she was. Humoring her, I asked, "Where are you?"

"L.A.," she said.

I was in Texas, as I had been when we had met. I said, "I'm not in L.A."

"Ugh," she said, then hung up. I don't know what she was expecting me to do, but even if she was across town, I wouldn't have wanted to see her.


  1. Quirky romantic comedy move would have been to buy a plane ticket there and you guys could have been doing it by half time. Real life though, she would stab you sometime during the second quarter because you spilled some beer on her lucky shirt and now her team was going to lose. Wow, is anyone else getting turned on?


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