Nipped in the Bud

Story Sent in by Ricky:

"Want to see something cool?" Antoinette asked me while out on our date. She opened her purse and showed me — no joke — at least 20 little alcohol nips.

I asked her, "Did you rob a liquor store?" while disappointedly thinking, Great, I'm on a date with an alcoholic.

She laughed and asked me, "Do you want one?"

I politely refused, and then she asked me if I thought I was better than she was. I said that I didn't think that. She then reached into her pocketbook, downed most of a vodka nip, then asked me again if I wanted any.

"Fine," I said, only hoping to move things along.

"Well too bad!" she said, "None for you!"

The date didn't last too much longer. We didn't even make it to dinner, because she said she wasn't feeling well and quit out early.


  1. Funny how Antoinette didn't deny robbing a liquor store. In my experience, anyone who laughs but doesn't answer if you ask them if they committed a crime usually committed the crime.

    And what kind of self respecting alcoholic carries the nip bottles around? You buy your drink of choice in a huge bottle and transfer the contents into a flask. Flasks are damn classy and lady like, especially if there's a whimsical picture of Betty Boop on it.

  2. @ Devil - Not a chance. Any self respecting alcoholic knows you have to brown bag it all the way!

    This date took her pre-gaming seriously.

  3. You want to have your fifth broken down into change in case you run into any panhandlers.

  4. @ Fizziks - Actually, that's a good point. Cut out the middle man!

  5. What's wrong with this dude? A chick that carries around all that alcohol in her purse is pretty much a sure thing. And you don't even have to buy her a drink... she brings her own?! Sign ME up!

    This pandemic of Empty Vagina Syndrome evidenced by this site just astounds me...


Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.

Content Policy

A Bad Case of the Dates reserves the right to publish or not publish any submitted content at any time, and by submitting content to A Bad Case of the Dates, you retain original copyright, but are granting us the right to post, edit, and/or republish your content forever and in any media throughout the universe. If Zeta Reticulans come down from their home planet to harvest bad dating stories, you could become an intergalactic megastar. Go you!

A Bad Case of the Dates is not responsible for user comments. We also reserve the right to delete any comments at any time and for any reason. We're hoping to not have to, though.

Aching to reach us? abadcaseofthedates at gmail dot com.