Fool's Gold

Story Sent in by Mina:

Bob wrote to me online, and his messages were packed with good humor and lots of questions. I liked his personality and so he asked me out for "dinner and an adventure."

We planned to drive separately, and he gave me an address at which to meet him in the late afternoon. I thought that it would be a restaurant. It was a convenience store. Bob was already inside.

"Why are we meeting here?" I asked him.

He handed me three wrapped apple pies from a nearby shelf. "You need sustenance," he said, "Take these."

"What's your plan?" I asked.

"First we eat these pies," he said, grabbing several for himself, "Then we strike off!"

"For where?" I asked, up for an adventure, as long as it wasn't anything too crazy.

"There's a crazy place just out of town. You can follow me there so you don't have to worry about me attacking you and leaving you for dead."


I followed him out of town in my car. He turned down a few quiet streets, then parked his car on the side of a tree-lined road. I parked behind him and we traipsed a little way into a forest. He led me to the ruins of an old house, the only real intact part of which was the chimney.

As I watched, he stepped into the ruins, walked up to the chimney, reached his arm up into it, and pulled out a gold chain. He carried it over to me.

"Put this on," he said.

"Is it yours? Did you put it in there?"

He said, "Yes. Put it on."

I took it from him. It was costume jewelry, and I didn't see anything wrong with trying it on, so I did. He nodded and said, "Great. Ready to go back to town?"

I replied, "Yeah... what's this all about?"

"You'll see," he said, "It has to do with our next destination."

I climbed back into my car and followed him back to town, where we parked. He took me back to the same convenience store and grabbed a few more apple pies.

I said, "If we fill up with pies, we won't have room for dinner. We're still doing dinner, right?"

He handed me two pies and said, "You need sustenance. Take these."

I put them back on the shelf. He ignored that, paid for his pies, and we walked out of the store. He said, "Follow me, okay? Don't lose me."

I again followed him in my car. He led me back to the same ruined chimney, reached into it, and pulled out another gold chain. He handed it to me and asked me, "Will you put it on?"

I was growing tired of whatever he was doing, and so I said, "Can we do dinner soon? I'm sorry, I don't get this."

He handed me the chain and said, "I'd like you to put it on." He then stepped into his car, and I followed him back to town, and back to the same convenience store.

Once inside, he grabbed another small handful of apple pies. He handed me a couple and said, "You need these. Sustenance."

I didn't take them and said, "I'm going to find a place to sit down for dinner. Come on. Let's do that."

He paid for more pies for himself, then jumped into his car and drove off. I didn't follow him, and thus the date ended. I held on to the two fake gold chains for a little while, but he never contacted me about them, and as of now, I have no idea where I put them.


  1. Err... you went into a forest with some guy you didn't know? Alright then...
    (I'm actually really curious as to what was up with the apple pies).

  2. Yet another instance of stranger danger. Good idea to drive separately but following strangers into secluded areas not so much.

  3. I think he was trying to set up a sort of treasure hunt date activity, but either he didn't have time to set it up right or just plain didn't have the imagination for it.

    Still, props to him for coming up with something different than ye olde dinner and a movie, at least.

  4. The way he kept repeating the same words and actions makes me wonder if he thought the date was a video game. Like, he has limited inventory space so he has to keep going back and forth, and eat "sustenance" for health.

    Also, my first thoughts were that of S as well - "driving in the same car as a stranger is unsafe, but going to a secluded, dilapidated house is okay?"

  5. I'd make a joke about the Matrix resetting, but the last time I did that was to one of my students, who was a kid when it came out, and then I realized that it's totally no longer a current joke and I've become an old fogey and how did that happen?

    I would have been curious to check how many gold chains were up there before I drove away the last time.

  6. This is what happens when you date on groundhog day

  7. This is hilarious! It had to have been a dare or a bet or something. It's just too odd.

    @Agnes (or anyone else) - if you want to see a cool repeating loop, check this out: http://improveverywhere.com/2003/03/22/the-moebius/

  8. I was thinking it sounded a lot like something from Zork.

  9. CTRL-C usually breaks you to terminal.

  10. I bet it was some kind of game, trying to get you to go back and forth for apple pies and gold chains. the gold chains are the way to keep score. probably has a challenge among his friends to see who can give out the most chains to a girl.


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