Could've Used Him as Halloween Decor

Story Sent in by Margaret:

Todd and I met online, found that we had a lot of things in common, and were supposed to meet at a restaurant for our first date.

On the way out of my house, I nearly tripped over a human-shaped mass piled right at my front door. It stank of alcohol. Upon closer inspection, I found that it was Todd.

"Oh my God. Todd?" I asked.

He was barely responsive, but managed to blink his eyes open and mutter, "Happy birthday!"

"My birthday was two months ago."

"Happy birthday!" Todd croaked again.

I wondered how he had found my house (although he probably did it through an Internet search) and then I wondered what to do with him. A date was out of the question. He could barely sit up, let alone stand. I wasn't about to let him sleep it off inside my house, and I didn't want him spending the night on my porch.

The only option I could think of was to call the police, explain that I didn't consider him a menace, just that I thought that he needed a ride home.

I waited with Todd as he snored. An officer came by and was very compassionate about the whole thing. He put Todd in the back of his cruiser and Todd woke up enough to say, "Another night with the cops." The policeman assured me that he'd bring Todd home.

Two days later, an email arrived from Todd. It asked, "Want to go out sometime?" as if our prior encounter had never happened. Well, it had, and I reminded him of it, and explained that I thought it best that we didn't meet up again. I took his silence as agreement.


  1. You didn't consider him a menance, so you called the police instead of a taxi!?

  2. I don't see why I should have to pay for ANY drunk asshole's taxi. I'd have called the police too about the drunk on my porch.

  3. ^^^ Right on.

  4. I am bad at counting so I'll just hold down the button for a while and hope I get it^: ^^^^^^

  5. Did I miss a bit where the story says "he had no money"? And since when does calling the taxi involve paying for the taxi? He who rides, pays.

    Simple: call/hail a taxi, shove him in, slam door, walk off.

    No police, no potential criminal record. No menace, after all.

    P.S. ^^^ sheep

  6. ^ And how exactly would he have payed or even gotten out of the cab? According to the story, he was too drunk to even stay conscious. Would the taxi driver help him get into his apartment/house? Doubtful. (S)he would probably take the date's wallet, help (her)himself to the cash, and dump him out. That's assuming he even had his wallet on him.

  7. ^^ Call a taxi & Shove him in? Huh?

    Why should the OP be responsible for doing anything for this idiot?
    Why should the poor cab driver be responsible for this idiot?
    How do they know he had or didn't have money?
    Should they have rifled through his pockets to find out?
    What if he says he had $100 in his pocket and blamed the OP or cab driver for stealing it?

    Shoving him in a cab would probably take both of them time and effort.
    He's drunk and dead weight.
    What if he got hurt while doing this?

    People SUE for less. Suddenly it all comes back on the OP for 'trying' to help out. I don't think so.

    Dan, I get you want to play devils advocate and go against the majority but if you think it's that simple, then so are you.

  8. Team Howie.

  9. STFU, Dan. OP is not responsible for drunken fools.

  10. Howie... what is this feeling... respect? It can't be!

  11. ^ Sorry theMediator...I got out of character there!

  12. She doesn't know his address.


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