System of a Clown

Story Sent in by Olivia:

Roger and I were both into the same types of music. He took me out to a couple of concerts and to dinner, and I liked the time I spent with him.

Not long after we started to date, he told me that he was having a new sound system installed in his car. I had never been in his car to have heard his old system, but he assured me that the new one was amazing: seven speakers, a huge subwoofer, and capable of being heard from blocks and blocks away. I told him that I looked forward to hearing it in action.

I didn't have long to wait. By the next time we went out, it had been installed. He picked me up and we went for a drive.

At first, he played the music very low. Then, he stopped the car and asked me, "Ready?"

I replied, "Yeah. Not too loud."

Apparently, he didn't hear my request, because he blasted it loud enough to shake the pavement beneath us. I reached for the volume, but he cupped my face in his hands and tried to kiss me.

I tore away and hit the system's power button. I asked him, "Okay, what was that about?"

He hit the power button again, and the music shook the car. Once more, he opened his mouth and went for my face. I shoved him away and stopped the music.

He said, "I'm sorry. That isn't me. The music, you know? It makes me want to just—"

He hit the power button again and dove for my face. I jumped out of and away from the car. He also jumped out of it and walked toward me, his hands out as if to grab me and his tongue wagging from side to side.

"Stay away from me!" I said, and when it was clear that he wasn't going to do that, I ran. For about five minutes solid, I tore off until I couldn't hear his music or his footsteps any longer.

He called me, and I picked up. He said, "I'm so sorry. It's the music. When I hear it like that it feels like I can do anything. I have to learn to use its power wisely. Come on back."

He must have heard the shake in my voice. "I think I'm good. Maybe we can hang out again at another concert or something."

He didn't respond right away, but when he did, he said, "But the music is off, now. I'm all better. Come back."


Another long stretch of silence. Then, he said, "But I'm all better now. The music has stopped. Come back."

I said, "Why don't you call me next week? We can figure it all out, then."

"Figure what out?" he asked, "It's the music! Not me! I just have to use it responsibly." All of a sudden, music came up in the background on his end of the phone. It grew louder and louder until he said, "Oh God! Where are you? I'm gonna drive around until I find you and take you!"

I hung up, hurried away from where I was, and called a friend to pick me up. I was concerned, as Roger knew where I lived. However, he never came by, and I ignored his further messages.


  1. you had dated for a while and he tried to kiss you. OH THE HORRORS!

  2. The first time is acceptable to try making a move. All the other times, after it's clear they're unwelcome? Unsarcastically, yes, the horrors!

  3. It's one thing to try to kiss a girl you've been dating. It's another thing to say, "This music makes me want to push myself on you whether you like it or not." Excellent dodging of A Bad Case of the Rapes.

  4. Um kaaaaaayy. I love music too in a way that kinda makes me a freak but I'm not gonna rape some poor unsuspecting dude...yet.

    I need to learn to use it's power wisely. Okay what the hell? It sounds like it came out of a Spiderman movie. With great power comes great responsibility.


  5. No, he didn't try to kiss her, he tried to force himself on her after she made it clear she was not interested, chased her around when she told him to get away from her, blamed it all on the music (they'd already been out to concerts; why didn't it affect him then?), and then lied about stopping to try and get OP back in his car. Not to mention that he blasted the music far too loudly for OP's comfort and kept switching it back on everytime she tried to turn it off, so even if his ridiculous excuse made any sense, he could have just turned it off if he were truly concerned about his behavior.

    It's really a far cry from "guy I'd been out with a couple of times tried to kiss me, isn't it awful?!"

  6. I'd be a lot more than "mildly anxious" if someone chased me down the street, but that's just me.

  7. If loud music alegedly makes him lose control, why would you suggest seeing him again at a concert? Sounds like a recipe for disaster...

  8. Ever been unwittingly groped or otherwise sexually assaulted against your will? It tends to result in a fuckofalotmore than "mild anxiety," Churro. I'm not trying to play some weakling, damsel-in-distress card, here; but damn, nobody, man or woman, deserves to have shit like that come down on them.

  9. I like to imagine the music is nsync. makes it highly entertaining to read! :)

  10. I'm glad she told that guy Bye Bye Bye.

  11. @ Jenny> As far as I can tell, churro is one of those armchair tactician twats who likes to tell people what they should've done after the fact with little regard for what it's like to be in the situation.


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