Horse Play

Story Sent in by Julian:

I met Felicia online. Her profile essays were a little sparse, but I liked what I read. I wrote to her, and she never wrote back, so she didn't cross my mind until a few weeks later, when a message from her appeared in my inbox.

She wrote that she had been at an intensive cooking school program for a while, and hadn't had the time to write back. I was an amateur cook, myself, and we found that we had a lot in common, in addition to promising to cook for each other. After a few weeks of speaking over email and over the phone, I asked her if she wanted to meet up.

"It's a little too soon," she told me, "I'm sorry. I haven't had good experiences with online guys. They've all treated me like crap."

"I understand," I replied, "Whatever you're comfortable with."

I didn't think much more of it, and we continued to talk. One thing that stuck out was that, in one message to me, she asked out of the blue, "Do you like horses?"

I replied, "I suppose so. Why?"

But no response to my curiosity ever came, and I shortly forgot that the question was ever asked. Not long after, she asked me if I still wanted to meet her. I did, and we made plans to meet in a park.

I made it there first and sat on a bench. The time of our meeting came and went, and she didn't show. My phone rang, and I saw that it was her. I picked it up to answer, but she hung up. I tried her back, but then something unexpected happened.

A person in a blue dress and wearing a full-head horse mask walked down the path, toward me. Then, right behind the first person, a second one walked, in a dress shirt and jeans, and also wearing the same horse mask. Then, from a different path, but still close by, a third person, all in black, walked towards me, also in a horse mask.

I stood up from the bench. The three horse-people stopped and looked at me from about ten feet away. All I could utter was, "Uh... Felicia?"

They didn't move. I asked, "Is one of you Felicia?"

Still no movement. I smiled and repeated the question. They didn't move or say a word. "Okay..." I said, and walked away. They followed me. As I walked, I pulled out my phone, in the hope that if one of them was Felicia, it would ring. It didn't, and her phone went to voicemail. I hung up, and as I walked, the horse-people hung back further and further until they didn't follow me anymore. I made it out of the park, tried Felicia one more time, left a short message, waited around a bit, and then went home.

I wrote her an email to ask her if she was behind the horse thing. She wrote back, "Ah, horses!" and that was the last I heard from her.


  1. Amateur cook?
    You work in fast food?
    You weren't picked up in the NFL (National Food League) draft?
    I cook for myself at home...Am I an amateur?

  2. That's far too weird to be made up.


  3. Oddly enough, there are similar stories on this site - perhaps all the work of a Costumed Prankster...

  4. Why did you walk away? I'd have just waited. I can out-silence anyone when I got my mind on it.

  5. This is highly unusual, I thought horse-people only appeared in pairs..

    *insert horse-people, Sarah Jessica Parker joke*

  6. Don't forget Lionel Richie..

    Hey Lionel...why the long face?


  7. That is pretty bizarre... but so funny. I might take to carrying a couple of sugar lumps on dates in future to pass what was clearly a 'shit test' lol

  8. Wow, I can't even tell what she was attempting with this one, other than the possibility that she decided early on that she just didn't like the OP and decided to stage a prank of sorts to mess with him.

    If you talk to someone for weeks and they still think it's too soon to meet, that means your time is better used elsewhere.

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  11. Nikki I'm surprised you'd say that. In terms of crazy/fucked up the stories here sort of have a set precedent.

    And to prove it I've searched for and selected four of your past comments that can be applicable to this story (yes I have that much time, it's called procrastination).

    4. "I...I can't even think of anything to say about this. How completely bizarre"


    2. "This totally sounded like something that would happen to Jared. Even though it wasn't in his usual writing style, I still went back and checked the name on the post"

    1. (Lastly, my personal favourite) "It's called therapy, bitch. *sigh* Please give it a try"

  12. hee hee hee hee hee

    Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, Sawyer. While I understand that this site has raised the bar SIGNIFICANTLY for insanity, I STILL manage to be shocked that people like this exist. People who dress up as clowns, Renaissance-era wenches, horses, and vampires, all in seriousness.

    Every time I think that we've read the craziest shit this site has to offer, someone comes in with a better, more bizarre story. It's gotten to the point where a friend of mine, who's just getting average, lame emails from some guy (but is hoping it turns into a bcotd) shares them with me, I just shrug and say it's not that bad. At this point, he could say that lives inside a bear carcass, and I'd probably yawn.

  13. Luckily there were only three. I had this creepy thought of horse-people flooding onto the main path from all different directions... *shudder*

  14. Does anyone else see the pattern though?

  15. True Nikki, I read this story to a friend & she thought it was crazy, "There were 3 people wearing full head horse mask!!" took a while for this to sink in as somewhat odd.

    On the one hand we The Readership of The ABCotD have pretty much been desensitized to insanity yet we'll still come across a story where we're like "Jesus Christ!/WTF/OMG/Uhm, wow..", but ja think I'd yawn too at someone living in a bear carcass, a hippo however..

  16. Oddly enough, I too have only seen horse people in pairs. Maybe a they were looking for a 4th?

  17. How did she talk her friends into dressing up like horses and following someone around the park? I don't know if my friends would stock a stranger in costume for me. I wonder what weird favor she owed them for this

  18. This is the second time I read about a date including people in horse masks..smh


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