'Ol Wet Lap

Story Submitted by Wesley:

This was one of my very first dates, back in high school.  I asked out my best friend's twin sister, Phoebe.  How nice and neat, I thought, if we get married, then my best friend and I will be brothers-in-law.  Awesome.  It also didn't hurt that Phoebe was very attractive and that we were already friendly.

I asked her out to a nice Italian place in town and I picked her up on a Saturday evening.  Phoebe was usually fun and talkative, but she was quiet and seemed nervous on the ride over.

"Everything okay?" I asked her.  She nodded.  I went on, "You do want to go out, right?"  She nodded again.  I figured that she just needed time to get comfortable with the idea of being on a date with me, and I liked her enough to give her that time.

She and I sat down across from each other at the restaurant, and so began one of the most awkward dinners I could ever remember.  She hardly made eye contact with me, rarely spoke, and when she did, it was barely a whisper.  Clearly, she was uncomfortable or something else was wrong.

I finally asked her, "Is something wrong?  You really don't seem to want to be here."

She looked at me for possibly the first time that evening and said, "I think I'm going to call my brother and have him pick me up.  I'm sorry."

I asked, "Did I do something wrong?"

Then she did something I didn't expect.  She kissed her pointer finger, tapped my nose with it, gave me a smirk, then stood up, took her full water glass, and splashed its contents into my lap.

I shouted, "Hey!" and mopped up the mess while she walked off.

As I said, we went to high school together, so it wasn't as though I wouldn't be seeing her again.  When I did, she acted friendly and jovial as if nothing had happened.  However, whenever I've brought up the date since then, she always clams up.  I'm still in touch with her and her brother, and it has always remained a mystery.


  1. Girl acts crazy, nobody gets a reason why.


  2. Hmmm. Maybe girl IS crazy.

  3. And to be fair, guys act crazy, too. Sometimes.

  4. I wasn't really commenting on the whole dating world in general, just this story in particular. I accept that guys tend to get crazy too.

  5. Jared, we've been having a lot of comment pages that have turned into actual discussions lately. Are the logistics of putting in threaded comments or opt-in email responses prohibitive? I think that would be useful on some of the pages, because it's a pain to have to check back to pages from days ago to see if there are any new responses.

  6. ^ Awww, I actually enjoy the discussions (even if it is a pain in the ass always checking back)! Especially when someone says something dumb/trollish!

  7. I like them too! I was thinking that it would improve the discussionability of the threads, Baku! Make it easier to see what's a reply to what, what's new, etc. I hope it didn't sound like a complaint about the discussions, just about the barriers to accessing them.

  8. Such functionality already exists.

    1. At the bottom of each post's page, there a link to "Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)."

    2. Underneath the comment box, there's a link called "Subscribe by email."

    Go to town.

  9. Goodness gracious me, so it does! Pardon me while I clutch my pearls and lie on my fainting couch to recover from my sudden bout of amazement.

  10. OP, the only explanation I can think of is that you maybe had a massive boner throughout the whole date..?

  11. @Agnes - awesome comment

  12. D'oh! I didn't even notice XP

  13. ...
    Did anyone know that link was there?


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