A Life-Shattering Experience

Story Submitted by Reggie:

Maureen had invited me to her house for a homemade dinner for our second date.  She lived with her parents to save money after graduating college, but they would be away visiting her aunt and uncle until later that evening.

I brought some homemade cookies and a bottle of wine, and she met me outside by my car in her stocking feet.  When we made it to her front door, though, we found that she had accidentally locked it behind her.

"Shit!" she said, and yanked on the door.  It was locked as locked could be.  She turned to me and said, "I left the oven on!  What do I do?"

I asked, "How far away are your folks?"

"An hour away!" she snapped, "They can't help me!"

"Do any neighbors have the keys?  We can call the fire department to break down the door."

Maureen was already on plan D.  She asked me for one of my shoes.  "What for?" I asked her.

"I have an idea to get in," she said, and so I gave her my right shoe.

She picked up a small rock from the area next to a tree in her yard, then threw it at her front bay window.  The rock went through the glass, but didn't shatter it.  She then put her hand inside my shoe and whacked at the hole in the glass.  It shattered at once.  Aside from clearing away a bit more, it was safe to pass through.

She handed me my shoe, climbed in, and said, "My parents will freak at me if I tell them that I locked myself out.  We tell them that you did it by accident."

I said, "Me?  An accident?  No way.  You want your parents to freak at me instead?  They'll want me to pay for it."

"Better than the alternative," she shrugged.

"This was all you.  We could've called the fire department to break open the door, or a neighbor who might have had the keys."

"Reggie," she said, "Listen to yourself!  How would either of those have helped?  This way, it's your fault, you go your merry way, and I go mine.  Now are you coming in or aren't you?"

A night with her seemed like nothing but a night of trouble, so I left then and there.  I don't know what she told her parents, but as of yet, I haven't received a window replacement bill.


  1. Jesus, was there no alternative to the front bay window? A back door with a window in it, a door frame with glass panels? Anything?

    If that was my girl, and there REALLY were no other options to get in, I would have applauded her quick thinking. But does anyone get the idea that she has had to do this before?

  2. As a girl who has locked myself out of the house several times, I'm in favor of having a hidden key. It can't be something obvious like porch ornament with a hidden compartment,you have to bury it or something along those lines...

  3. Good on you for leaving, OP. If she's that quick to shift her blame onto you so early on (and to your face no less), I can only imagine what a nightmare actually dating her would be like.

  4. The last time I got locked out of my house I just kicked down the front door. Since the jam had to be replaced afterward we finally got a keysafe as it seemed to be a more cost effective alternative and we never had that kind of problem again.


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