Story Submitted by Dennis:
I first met Jeanna online, and we established a great rapport. I had no idea that she may have felt otherwise. We made plans to meet at a restaurant, then coffee.
We spoke every day during the week, leading up to the date, and on the day of, she called and said, "I have an idea for a fun change in plans for tonight. Do you know Bendigo State Park?"
I didn't, but when I looked it up, I saw that it was a solid hour away from where I lived. She said, "We can postpone dinner and whatever else. You'll like this idea. I buried something under a white birch tree there, near the parking lot. Dig it up, and then we can continue with the date."
I had a tangle of questions. "Will you be meeting me there? When did you bury it? Can this be postponed to another time?"
She said, "Trust me, it's worth it. Once you dig it up, you'll understand everything."
"Why couldn't you just give whatever it is to me in person? Could've saved us both some time."
She said, "But that would have been boring, and you said that you wanted more adventure in your life."
She was right about that, and I really liked her, so I re-framed the idea from "annoying" to "creative," and I drove out there.
There wasn't much traffic on the roads, and I parked in the lot right at dusk. There was no one else about, and I followed her directions to the tree she had described. I dug around a bit with a little spade that I had in my trunk, and sure enough, there was a little cardboard box, folded over. I opened it.
Inside was a note. It read: "Hi Dennis. I think that we'd be better as friends. Don't take it personally! Hugs, Jeanna."
She sent me off on a two-hour round trip to the middle of nowhere to tell me that she didn't want to even go out. What the fuck? I pulled out my phone, but didn't get any reception out there. I took the box with me and waited until a good coverage area, pulled out my phone, and...
...wait. What would happen? She'd pick up, probably have a good laugh at my anger, and then hang up, none the worse. No. This was a mean thing, on her part, to do, and I thought of just the right solution.
I didn't call her, and instead waited until I made it home to give her a ring. She picked up and sounded very excited. "Hi Dennis! Did you get my box?"
I said, "No. I've been home. Since it's our first time meeting, I think that I want to get to know you, first, before driving out somewhere. I'm sure you can understand. Would you drive out to the middle of nowhere if I asked you to, at this stage in our relationship?"
Long pause. Got you, sucker. She replied, "No. Fine. Let's meet."
Meet we did, and her disappointment was palpable in person. She might have taken me for a ride (literally) but I was not going to give her the satisfaction of knowing that.
After the date, I called her the next day to let her know that I didn't think we'd make a good match, and said, "So don't worry about whatever it was you buried for me out at Bendigo. I appreciate the sentiment."
"Yeah. Bye," she muttered, and hung up.
So I was a chump, yes. But so was she.
3/09/2011
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What a mean thing to do. If she didn't want to date him, she should have just said so. I would make that chick reimburse me for gas.
ReplyDeleteWell played, even with the bummer of lost time, energy and money.
ReplyDeleteNot bad... though I think it would have been better if instead of meeting her, you stood her up. Maybe give the waiter an envelope with a note telling her "I think we'd be better as friends."
ReplyDelete^That.
ReplyDeleteAnd ask her to meet you at a restaurant that's far away.
I was all "That was a brilliant idea, OP"...until wolfdreams came up with that great idea. Still, Dennis, good show.
ReplyDelete^ aha...true Nikki and Wolfie...but then she would probably know that he did in fact go to the destination and get her package!
ReplyDeleteSo I guess lacing her drink or food with laxatives would've been a bit much then..
ReplyDeleteShe would've figured out he dug up the letter if she went back to retrieve it.
ReplyDeleteDid no one else think of replacing her note with a bear trap?
ReplyDeleteMaybe standing her up would be a better way to go about things...
I agree that I thought the OP was going to stand her up; still good story though.
ReplyDeleteI'm with Karen. Got your revenge and did it with dignity and imagination as opposed to anger and dickitry.
ReplyDeleteBrilliant.
ReplyDeleteI liked how you pretended you didn't see the box. I would've liked it if you coaxed her into meeting you at a really nice place, only to stand her up.
ReplyDeleteBrilliant.
ReplyDelete