Snake in the Grass

Story Submitted by Marc:

Allison and I had been on several dates.  I was falling for her, but she was a little hard to read.  I figured that I had nothing to lose by bringing her out stargazing on one of the warmest nights of the year, and making my intentions clear.

I drove her a little out of town to a field I knew, spread out a blanket and some snacks, and we lay down.  I took her hand and kissed it, and she slid closer to me.  It was a cloudless night, full of stars, and everything was just perfect.

Then, she jumped.  "Shit," she whispered, "Did you feel that?"

I sat up.  "No.  What is it?"

"I felt something move underneath me."

"Let's move the blanket."

We stood up and gathered up the blanket.  I turned on my flashlight, which was probably a mistake, and shone it down on the ground.

Two garter snakes, which had been under the blanket, slithered quickly into a hole in the ground.  They startled me, for sure.  Allison yelped and tore off, into the field.

"Allison!" I called after her, "It's okay!  Come back!"

She didn't.  I crumpled the blanket and food into a ball and jogged after her, in the direction I thought she went.  I called for her for a while, shining my flashlight everywhere, but she didn't answer, and after several minutes, I had no idea where she was.

"I'll wait for you by the car!" I yelled into the darkness.  I figured that she'd have to come back there, eventually.  Of course, my cell phone had little to no reception out there, although I did get through once and left a message.

I returned to the car and put the lights on.  She didn't show up, and finally, I grew tired of waiting and went out to look for her again.  I called and called, but there was no response.  I must have searched up and down every inch of that field for at least two hours.

Finally, deciding that she'd likely be back at the car by then, I went back to it.  She wasn't there.  I climbed inside to wait, and must have fallen asleep, as the next thing I knew, it was morning, and the windows were all fogged up.

She wasn't in the car.  I jumped out, called for her, and she answered me.  I looked around, and there she was, in a nearby tree, about 15 feet up.

I helped her down and asked her, "Didn't you hear me when I called for you?  I was searching the field for hours, and I left the car lights on."

She said, "I know.  It was a little obsessive and weird, so I climbed up in the tree and prayed that you wouldn't find me."

I laughed.  She had to have been joking.  She wasn't.  She went on, "It's a little possessive and weird that you wouldn't stop looking for me."

I said, "I was worried about you.  Should I have not cared and just driven away?"

She said, "No, but just going back to the car to wait was all you had to do.  I was more afraid of you than of the snakes."

We drove back to civilization in relative silence.  I dropped her off at her house and received a text from her not too long after: "You didn't have to leave a voicemail.  Obsessive much?"

The whole situation turned me off to ever wanting to see her again, which, I guess, is exactly what she wanted.


  1. I'm sick of these women who are so quick to label the guy "obsessive" when he does them a human kindness. First of all, there really ARE guys who are obsessive and this is making light of it...and secondly, it makes me think that they're so used to dating callous jerks that they don't know what to do with basic courtesy.

  2. One summer, when I was in high school, I left a message on a girlfriend's answering machine to say hi. I didn't hear from her for a few days, and so I called to leave another message, also saying hi.

    She called me back almost instantly to ask me why I was being so possessive and obsessive. I asked her why she didn't call me back after the first message, and she said, "Because you're so possessive and obsessive, leaving me all of these messages."

    I didn't understand it then, and to the best of my knowledge, she didn't, either.

  3. "I don't CARE if I just got in a car wreck, calling me at the hospital like this is just stalkerish."

  4. ^ Haha! I'm glad I wasn't drinking anything when I read this.

    I don't get these women that label a guy as obsessive/possessive when he is being courteous or (dare I even suggest) showing a little concern.

    What the hell is wrong with people these days?

  5. It's a cop out. Just something they can say that no guy can ever argue against, because if he does, then he's just proving their point.

  6. ^That, but not.
    Both men and women do this sort of thing all the time (aside from climbing up trees...I was really waiting for the fire department to come rescue her).
    We distance ourselves from other humans to protect ourselves. Most of us don't literally distance ourselves, but we certainly do so emotionally.
    In the crazy-but-not-as-crazy-as-the-tree-nut world, we call this putting up "walls." We've all known people who, for whatever reason, just couldn't "let us in."
    Was she trying to get rid of him? Sure. But why? OP sounds like a decent and caring guy. The kind of guy who doesn't leave his date in the middle of an empty field on a midsummer's night.
    Sounds to me like this girl is projecting her own obsessions onto OP because she can't climb a tree to escape herself. Sad.

  7. This comment has been removed by the author.

  8. Isn't driving her back to her place obsessive?


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