I'm Sure He'll Find What He Seeks

Story Submitted by Ashlyn:

Chad and I met on a dating site, and it wasn't long before he invited me out for coffee.  He was a little younger than I was, but he seemed nice, and I wanted to give him a chance.

We met up outside in the evening and were a few blocks away from the cafe.  As we walked, we passed some brick civic building with an iron bar fence on either side of its driveway. 

Chad jumped behind the fence and said, "Look!  I'm in jail!"

I gave a short laugh and continued walking.  He hung back and said, "Hey, aren't you going to help me?"

I turned around and, playing along, said, "Why would I?  You obviously deserve to be there."

He stepped away from the bars and said, "Or maybe you're the one in prison.  For being a bitch!"

Still playing along, I said, "You're imprisoned here, with me, so I guess that makes you a bitch, too."

He said, "You can be my bitch.  Bitch."  He then beckoned to me from his side of the fence.  It was off the street, and I wasn't entirely comfortable with the idea, so I shook my head and said, "No.  You come over here."

He gave me a smirk, then unzipped his pants and said, "But I've got to make you my bitch."

I gasped and stepped away.  "I don't think we're really ready for that.  Prison or not."

"But we're in prison!  And you're my bitch!  You're my bitch!"

My, I thought, what a strange series of words to say to someone on a first date.  I dropped the game and said, "Chad, come on back over.  Let's keep going.  Zip it up."

He grabbed the iron bars like a desperate prisoner and howled, "I need my bitch!  Where's my bitch?  Where's my prison bitch?"

"Chad," I yelled, "Cut it out and get over here."

He zipped up his pants, moped over, and dragged his feet all the way to the cafe.  He offered to buy me coffee to make up for his behavior, and I let him do it, even though I was sure that there wouldn't be a second date.

We spoke quietly for several minutes, then, in the middle of our conversation, he stood up, straightened out his clothes, and said, "I just wanted you as my prison bitch," then took a drink from his coffee, put his cup back on the table, and left.

I remained behind, finished my drink, threw our cups out, and went home to bed, in a vain attempt to forget that the prior evening had happened in the first place.


  1. "Chad, come on back over. Let's keep going. Zip it up."

    "Chad," I yelled, "Cut it out and get over here."

    He offered to buy me coffee to make up for his behavior, and I let him do it, even though I was sure that there wouldn't be a second date.

    ... you perhaps need to set higher standards.

  2. Aww, Jason. You beat me to it!
    OP, if you let people (men or women) call you a bitch, I'm afraid you may begin to have unfortunate self esteem issues. Some people enjoy being humiliated and degraded for sexual gratification, and if that's your cup of tea, enjoy.
    In another post today, a women couldn't accept kindness from a concerned date because she considered him an obsessive stalker.
    In your case, I see the opposite end of the spectrum: you don't seem to expect appropriate behavior, and until you do, you will continue to be mistreated.

  3. He grabbed the iron bars like a desperate prisoner and howled, "I need my bitch! Where's my bitch? Where's my prison bitch?"

    At what point did this not tell you to just walk away?

  4. it would have been funny if some big thug named Butch went up behind him and buggered his butt-hole....or maybe it's just me.

  5. If a guy unzips his pants at all on the first date you should probably take off with or without free coffee.

  6. Rachel, are you a psych major in college?

  7. Rachel, did you just stumble over a psychology book and now post something from it in every post?


Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.

Content Policy

A Bad Case of the Dates reserves the right to publish or not publish any submitted content at any time, and by submitting content to A Bad Case of the Dates, you retain original copyright, but are granting us the right to post, edit, and/or republish your content forever and in any media throughout the universe. If Zeta Reticulans come down from their home planet to harvest bad dating stories, you could become an intergalactic megastar. Go you!

A Bad Case of the Dates is not responsible for user comments. We also reserve the right to delete any comments at any time and for any reason. We're hoping to not have to, though.

Aching to reach us? abadcaseofthedates at gmail dot com.