Get Bach Here

Story Submitted by Lauren:

Eric offered to bring me to an outdoor Bach concert. I love Bach, and so I looked forward to the evening with the music and with him.

When we arrived at the venue, it turned out that they were actually putting on a performance of Shakespeare's Twelfth Night. I didn't mind so much, as I liked Shakespeare, too.

Eric went up to the ticket window, and they told him that the Bach concert was next week. He had misread the calendar. Instead of offering to watch the play with me or to do something else, he demanded to see a manager.

"What are you doing?" I asked him, "Twelfth Night is fine."

A manager arrived and Eric said, "I received a schedule that promised a performance of Bach here tonight. We came all the way down here for Bach and I don't think that's fair."

The manager said, "Sir, our schedules specify Twelfth Night for tonight. I apologize for any confusion."

Eric said, "We're not leaving without Bach. Get Bach here now, or I'll have you shut down."

I intervened, "It's okay. Twelfth Night is fine."

"No it isn't," Eric said, "Twelfth Night is never fine." He turned back to the manager. "How about it? Bach or trouble?"

The manager stared at him, then said, "I'm sorry, sir. We have to get ready for the show. Excuse me."

Eric stormed out of the venue and I followed him. He said, "I'll have this place shuttered by Monday. You watch."

He climbed into his car and drove off, without me. I was already there, so I bought a ticket to a very entertaining performance. The theater is still open and I go there as often as I can.


  1. Even assuming he really did get a misprinted schedule somehow, did he really think they'd cancel a performance, refund everybody else's money, and summon an orchestra a day early... just for him? Dude was nuts.

  2. "Get Bach here"? This makes me wonder if he thought that Bach was, you know, still alive and would be performing the piece himself. :D

  3. ^That's where I went with it. Anyone stupid enough to think that they'd cancel a huge theatrical piece for a huge orchestral piece on the whim of some asshole who can't read shouldn't be patronizing the arts as a way to attract girls.

  4. I know women like guys who are confident, but seriously? Demanding a composer who has been dead more than 250 years only displays your ignorance.

  5. Great title, J.

  6. What the hell was his problem? Twelfth Night is my favorite Shakespeare play.

  7. I'm wondering if he actually knew who Bach was. Also, what's wrong with Twelfth Night?

  8. While I'm a fan of Twelfth Night, A Midsummer Night's Dream is my fave Shakespeare play to watch and act in.

    1. Oh my gosh. I was just about to say that A Midsummer Night's Dream is my favorite. I've always wanted to play Helena.

  9. The Tempest all the way!
    I agree with you guys, that guy was an idiot.
    The theatre staff probably had a good laugh about him.

  10. @Nikki: Word. I *heart* Puck.

  11. Kat, I've played Bottom twice and Hermia once, but it's my greatest theatrical goal to play Puck. Dammit, I'd be an AMAZING Puck.

  12. I saw the RSC perform MSND in London many moons ago. It was freaking AMAZING. Best play ever.

    I rarely have cause to pull out a classical monologue anymore, but Puck is the one I keep in my repertoire. I still have a soft spot for Dead Poets Society and the MSND scenes therein.


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