Muffin Bluffin'

Story Submitted by Brandi:

Andy wrote me online and he seemed especially fascinated with the fact that I bake.  I told him that muffins were a specialty, and he asked me what I used for ingredients.  I listed them off, including nutmeg.

"No on nutmeg," he said, "I'm allergic."

I wrote back, "That's fine.  I can leave it out."

We spoke for a few weeks and I invited him over to my apartment for a Saturday morning brunch.  I promised to make him muffins without nutmeg.  It was easy enough to leave out.

He showed up in a good mood, we spoke for a bit, had a light meal, and I gave him a muffin, one of about a dozen I had made.

He took a couple of bites before his chewing slowed and he gave me a dark look.  He said, "There's nutmeg in here."

I replied, "Nope.  Not even a little bit."

He stood, knocked his chair over, and said, "No, there is," and he stumbled and fell over.  He even twitched a bit on the ground for full effect.

I ignored the theatrics and asked him how he enjoyed them, otherwise.  Then, he started drooling on my carpet, and I had enough.  I said, "Door's over there, whenever you're done," and I even went and opened it for him.

He remained on my floor for at least an hour before I went off to do something on my computer.  By the time I came back to check on him, he and most of the muffins were gone.