Story Submitted by Lisa:
Gregory was close to ten minutes late to our date and I was about to call him when he called me. I figured he was lost or stuck in traffic, and neither was a big deal.
"Lisa," he whispered to me over the phone.
"I can barely hear you. Where are you?" I asked him.
He mumbled something that sounded like, "In jail," but I was sure that I had misheard him.
I asked, "What was that?"
"I'm in jail. You're my phone call. You have to listen to me."
I couldn't think of anything to say, so listen I did. He said, "I had a drink a couple of hours ago, just one drink, all right? Then I got in my car because I wanted to be early for our date, and somehow, the car hit someone's garbage cans. I was driving fine, it's the car that lost control. Then a cop showed up and just fucking arrested me! For no reason! I didn't do nothing."
I asked him, "Are you joking?"
"No, I'm not fucking joking!"
"I don't think I can help you."
"You're gonna help me. I need money."
"Call your family."
He yelled, "No!" and someone in the background said something about keeping it down. That more than anything else convinced me that he was where he said he was. He went on, "They can't know I'm here. If you get me out of here, I'll pay you back this month."
Maybe I was heartless. Was I heartless? I just didn't want to get involved, especially with a guy I had never even met yet. I told him, "I... I can't. I'm sorry. Tell them I couldn't help and ask them for another phone call. I'm sorry."
"Don't hang up!" he shouted, as if his life depended on it. I hung up. It was an awful situation.
I canceled my account on the dating site as soon as I made it home, and prayed that he wouldn't call me once he was out. Thankfully, he hasn't. I feel terrible about it, but what else should I have done?
2/11/2011
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OP, I would have done the exact same thing. You should never post bail for someone you don't know. If they skip out, you're on the hook for more money.
ReplyDeletePlus, his inability to accept responsibility for his actions ("I was driving fine, it's the car that lost control") shows that he's not a stand-up guy. Good job on keeping clear of him and his problems!
Seconded. Leave the guilt at home, Lisa. You're in the right on this one. Sketchy first almost-date.
ReplyDeleteYou absolutely did the right thing by not getting involved. What a psycho! No family or friends he could've called instead of a stranger he hasn't even met in person?
ReplyDeleteDodged a bullet there, OP.
Thirded. He obviously makes very poor decisions and refuses to take responsibility. He clearly knows he did something wrong if he was afraid to tell his family. One drink would not get him thrown in jail; his alcohol level had to have been higher than the legal limit.
ReplyDeleteSince Lulu beat me, I guess I should say "Fourthed"? Or is "Thirded" right since she didn't say it?
ReplyDeleteHe's either lying about how much he drank or what he hit or otherwise he wouldn't be in jail.
ReplyDeleteAnd the fact that he won't tell his family and would rather try and bilk bail money out of a complete stranger just goes to show you what kind of a guy he is. You were better off not getting involved.
As an amendment to my 1st comment - if you had put up his bail money, he most certainly wouldn't have repaid you for the loan. Then we'd be seeing you on Judge Judy...
ReplyDeleteThe OP did the right thing, unambiguously.
ReplyDeleteHis story's awfully unlikely ("the car lost control" - "got arrested for no reason"?). But even if you assume it's true, there's still the fact that he asked for money from someone who didn't even know him. And folks almost rarely do that unless they have no intention of repaying.
I'm curious if you were the first person he called, or like fifth or sixth on down the list. Was this on a Friday or something? KF