But She's Always a Woman to Me

Story Submitted by Ed:

Lisa and I were going to visit a coffee shop and take a walk for our first date.  She asked me if we had time to stop in a pharmacy because she needed some batteries.  We definitely had time, and I told her we'd do it.

At coffee, she took two calls, which I felt was a little rude.  Also, she didn't thank me for paying for her coffee.  I became a bit more anxious to finish up the date, and when I suggested that we go to grab her batteries, she agreed to the idea.

Inside the pharmacy, she found the batteries she was looking for, but she also discovered a section of those greeting cards that talk when you open them.  Of course, she had to open every one and hear what they all had to say.  Also, when she was done with each, she'd just drop it on the floor and not even replace it on the shelf.

I told her, "Maybe you should not drop those on the floor."

She replied, "You're not my daddy-kins!"

I wasn't anybody's "daddy-kins," but I knew crappy behavior when I saw it.  When she made it to the end of the greeting cards, she found her way to the office supplies, opened a pack of note cards and a box of crayons, drew a green squiggle on one of the note cards, and dropped them all on the ground.

She asked me, "Ready to go?"

I was ready, all right.  I couldn't wait to be done with this humiliating date.  Once we were outside, I told her that I was probably going to go.  She buried her face into my chest and sucked her thumb.  I asked her to stop and she did.  We then parted ways.


  1. It was weird until the the thumb-sucking part, then I got seriously creeped out O_o
    Run. RUN!

  2. Please tell us whether you had any clue you were about to date a psycho!

    On one of my first dates with my ex, she told me she was saving herself for marriage. I chose, foolishly, to ignore that huge red flag.

  3. ^ Er . . . what exactly is wrong with saving yourself for marriage? I know it is not the norm nowadays, but I don't see how abstinent = psycho.

  4. ^ There are two very different kinds of women who say "I'm saving myself for marriage". The ones who are sincere about it & truthful in their intention, & then there are the crazy ones for whom it may or may not be true who just say it for whatever reason (boredom, sounds fun saying it out loud, because it's June, eh, wanted to see your reaction, etc).

  5. ^ You forgot the "kinda-sorta-not-really-virgin virgin" type that still give oral sex and send naked pics to their SO to "give them something to look forward to". XD

  6. ^^ I find nothing wrong that.

  7. Kinda wish OP had tried harder to stop her from leaving what sounds to be quite a mess in the store.


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