At Least Free Food Court Samples Were Likely Involved

Story Submitted by Martin:

Suzanne and I had planned to meet at a mall and, if it was a nice day, go for a walk outside and have some lunch.

I felt that something might have been amiss after she didn't show up after 20 minutes.  I called her.

She said, "Sorry.  My Internet is down.  My brother's trying to fix it.  He's on the telephone pole."

"Your brother has climbed the telephone pole?"

"He's done this a million times before.  Look, can I call you back?  I'll get there as soon as I can."

I found the food court, had lunch by myself (what was I going to do?  Wait for her?) and walked around.

About an hour after I had been at the mall, she called to ask, "Can I have a ride to my friend's house?  I'm sorry, but I couldn't think of who else to ask."

I said, "We were going to have a date, right?  We've never even met in person before, and you're asking for a ride to your friend's?"

"Can we move the date?" she asked, "It's really important that I go to his place."

I asked, "How long will you be?  Can we go on our date after?"

She agreed to that, and she gave me her address.  I picked her up and she directed me to her friend's house, which, being honest, she could have walked in the amount of time it took me to leave the mall and drive her there.

Before leaving my car, she said, "I don't know how long I'll be.  You can wait, or I'll call when I'm ready to be picked up."

She stepped out of my car without a thank you and walked into her friend's house.  I drove off.

It was after 10pm when Suzanne called me, asking to be picked up.  "Sorry," I said, "Can't do it."

She whined, "But you said to call you when I was ready and you'd pick me up."

I replied, "I never said that.  And besides, thanks to you, I wasted my day waiting for a date that never took place."

"Shut up about the fucking date!" she said, "Are you picking me up or not?"

I hung up on her.  She called twice after that, but I didn't answer.