Story Submitted by Kate:
Graham and I had been talking for a little while on a dating site when it hit me that some friends of mine were having a barbecue get-together on a forthcoming Friday night, one of the last Fridays of August. I asked him if he wanted to meet a little before, and then join up with my friends.
He was really into the idea, and I looked forward to it all week.
That Friday, we met at a restaurant. It didn't occur to me that anything was out of order, but when he said, "I've never done anything like this before," it struck me as odd.
"A barbecue?" I asked.
He smiled and said, "Yeah. A barbecue."
I was confused, but I didn't pursue my confusion and figured that he was just being silly.
We joined up with my friends at one of their houses afterward. There was a bonfire and guitars and about ten of us, altogether. It was a great way to end the summer, and at first, it seemed as though everyone liked Graham and he liked them. I was afraid that I'd overwhelm him with meeting them on a first date, but he seemed perfectly fine, which was a relief to me.
After a little less than an hour, we had one of those moments when we all stopped talking at once. Then Graham stood up and said, "So, are we going to get started here?" and took off his shirt.
Everyone looked at me, as if I was responsible for him. I asked him, "What are you doing?"
He kicked off his shoes and peeled off his socks.
"This is a barbecue party, isn't it?" He took off his belt.
"Are you stripping? Please don't," I said.
"Come on," he said, pulling his pants down, "It's a party."
I said, "Not that kind of party! Put your pants on!"
He gave me a confused look and said, "I thought this was supposed to be an orgy? Or does everyone need to loosen up more? I've got no diseases," he said.
My friends started laughing. I said, "It's not an orgy, hun. But good joke." I did my best to save him some face.
"Doesn't mean it can't be," he said, effectively destroying my attempts to rationalize his behavior, "Who's up for it?"
No one said anything. After a moment, he said, "Seriously?"
No response.
He pulled his pants on and said, "Whatever. I'm out."
He grabbed his other clothes and made for his car, in front of the house. I followed him and tried to get him to stay, telling him that my friends all had a good sense of humor and that it would all be a funny story and that we'd all still be able to have a good time together.
He said, "Not the kind of good time that you promised."
I was stunned and didn't say anything, but I can tell you right now that I never, ever promised him an orgy. I think I'd remember that.
He drove off, I returned to the bonfire, and we all had a good laugh about it. We still do.
11/08/2010
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"After he left, we had an orgy."
ReplyDelete*jaw drop*
ReplyDeleteThis has to have been some kind of bet or dare or performance art.
ReplyDeleteOh, quit being so stuck up. Why, I have orgies all. the. time. Just last weekend, we had one. My mom and dad were there, even nana made it all the way from Chicago. Nana orgies the best rib eye and corn on the cob ever, let me tell you what.
ReplyDeleteJust a good ol' fashioned nomatophobia family orgy.
Note: Never accept BBQ invitations from Graham. Who knows what he's drizzling on the meat.
ReplyDelete