How Much Thought Do You Think Went Into This?

E-mail Submitted by Paige:


I'm not sure how to write one of these things, but here goes: I was trying to figure out how to start one of these messages, but I came up blank.  How does one write an opening to a stranger? 

I could begin by telling you all about me, but that would be narcissistic.  I could ask you questions about you, but that would be too eager.  I could talk about something non-related to either of us, but then what would be the point to me writing in the first place!

I've never been very good at introductions.  I never know what to say.  How is the weather?  No, that's too straight.  Do you wear thongs?  No, that's too personal.  When did you lose your virginity?  That's way too personal.  Some sort of happy medium would suffice, I think.  I'm strapped for ideas, though.

I could talk about this site itself and discuss it at length.  That's something we both have in common.  We're both on the same site, aren't we?  What do you think of this site?  Is that a good first question?  What brought you to the site?  That might be a bit too personal, as what brought you to the site might have been a breakup.  That's what brought me to this site.  A breakup.  A bad breakup.

Want to know more?  Ask away.



  1. I think that's actually a pretty nice email. It's well written and interesting. If a guy wrote that to me (and I was single), I'd at least give it a shot. I'm also assuming the "Want to know more?" was supposed to be about him in general and not just the bad breakup.

  2. @Kate:
    Seriously? Wow. I did it all wrong by employing discretion and personality in the messages that I wrote.

  3. I would be happy to get that email.

  4. The parts with things and virginity were waaay out of line for a first email, he should have just opened by saying he was rich.

  5. This looks like an email I could've written. I suck at writing introductory emails ^^

  6. Really, ladies? You'd go for this type of email? It sounds like an awkward 14-year-old boy who spends way too much time writing bad poetry about the girls he likes wrote it. It's an unnecessary stream-of-consciousness email that only gives off the first impression that this guy's not even confident enough to fake his way through an introductory email to someone on a dating site.

    I'd press delete without even wondering anything else about him.

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  8. Could you imagine a first date? It'd take 4 friggin hours just to order dinner. Should I get the steak, no - that's way too presumptuous. What about the tacos? No - she'll think I'm too fun-loving. What about the french fries? No, she'll think I'm poor. If I get shrimp - what if she's a shrimp activist? What about the lamb chops...no...what if she had some kind of horrific 'Silence of the Lambs' experience when she was a kid. Ohmygodohmygodohmygod what do I do?!


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