Roller Coaster of Doom

Submitted by Ryan:

Rachel and I were at an amusement park together.  I had already paid for her ticket, and of course, she never thanked me, so that was strike one.  Strike two was when she picked out the most expensive dinner item to eat in the park and didn't even reach for her purse when it was time to pay for it.  Strike two.  Maybe I'm cheap, but I don't think that me paying for stuff should be automatically expected.

My stomach can be sensitive for a little while after eating, so I planned to either do a lot of walking or stick to the easier rides for a little bit after dinner.  Rachel, though, wanted to hit one of the biggest roller coasters in the park, one with sharp turns, a bunch of upside-down moments, and general vomit-inducers.

I told her that she could go, but that I'd likely sit it out.  She started making fun of me, and not in a teasing, flirty way.  It was pretty mean-spirited.

"You've got to be kidding me," she said, "Are you fucking kidding me?  You're kidding me, right?"

Every other word out of her mouth was a variant on the above.  I informed her that no, I wasn't kidding.  I'd have no problem waiting for her, and she'd likely be far happier on a ride in which I wasn't more concerned with keeping food down than with having fun.

She turned and stood in line without a word to me.  I followed her on the line, thinking that the least I could do was keep her company while she waited, but she actually ducked down a little bit and muttered, "I hope that no one I know sees me... this is so embarrassing."

So I waited with her all the same until it came to be her turn on line.  I stepped out and waited for her.  I watched the ride climb up, then sail down, then climb up another rise... and then stop short.  For some reason, they had held up the roller coaster at one of its highest points.  I tried to see what was wrong, but couldn't from where I was.

I found a ride operator and asked her what was happening.  She said that it was a technical issue and nothing to be worried about.  The ride would be moving again momentarily.

Twenty minutes later, the ride continued and finished up.  Rachel stormed out of the gate.  Before I could even ask her if she was okay, she screamed right in my face.  "How dare you" this and "You left me alone up there" that.

I blurted, "I told you I wasn't going on the ride with you!  It's not my fault that they had a technical glitch!"

She repeated, "You left me alone up there, and I will never forgive you."

I repeated, "I said that I wasn't going to go on the ride."

She demanded, "Buy me a soda!"

I told her that there was no way that I was going to buy her anything, given that she never said thank you for anything that I had previously bought.

Her response?  "You're the boy!"

So many possible responses came to mind, but the easiest one won out:

"Fuck you."

She opened her mouth and stared at me.  I repeated, "Yeah.  That's right.  Fuck you.  Fuck you."

I walked away as fast as I could.  She didn't follow, but she sent me about thirty texts, each one going through a different stage of anger/depression/bargaining, etc.

I wonder how she made it home.


  1. You should have bought the bitch a black eye.

  2. Sometimes, the old standbys are exactly what you need to get your point across.

  3. If this was all true then it seems like you got out before the worst of it. Plenty of girls out there see dating as a way to get men to buy them stuff without any strings and she definitely seems like one of them. If you had stayed this date would have probably turned into one of those "Oh I'm sorry you thought I was interested in you, I just wanted a free meal," dates that sets woman's rights back a century. Of course you're already out one expensive entree so you took a bullet this time, but at least you didn't have to stand there while she shoved a salt stake into the bullet wound.

  4. Well done OP for handling it so well, that girl was obviously looking for some drama.

  5. This is so totally refreshing and awesome. Thank you.

    Thank you.

  6. I agree with the majority of the prior posters that this girl was a high maintenance trick who needed to be brought back to reality.

    True story though, when you said the ride had stopped, I just kept hoping that it was because she had thrown up all over herself.

  7. I think this is the first story I've seen on this site where someone actually says "Fuck you".


  8. Haha, Nikki, I'm with you. I was totally expecting she'd yarfed all over herself.

    OP- I don't know that you needed to get on her level with the "Fuck You", but I don't necessarily blame you on that one, either.

  9. I think the OP should have either gone on the rollercoaster the first time, or gone on it with her after she got off. Then you would have puked and hopefully aimed it on her. Then buy her a black eye. A puke decorated black eye.

  10. " Strike two was when she picked out the most expensive dinner item to eat in the park and didn't even reach for her purse when it was time to pay for it. "

    Are you KIDDING me?? You're at an amusement park. What's the most expensive thing you can eat there? TWO slices of pizza?


  11. HAHAHA she was asking for it and how the hell maybe she wanted you to come up there on to highest point of a Roller Coaster and hold her hand you handle it well by saying that to her

  12. ^English isn't your first language is it? Let me tell you something: those language translator web sites aren't as accurate as you think they are. Take an ESL course and then comment.

  13. Wow, I hate to share a name with someone like that.

  14. Nocturnesthesia6/06/2010 1:16 AM

    Good for you man. It's erratic bitches like this that give females a bad reputation. Most men wouldn't have it in them to call a woman out like that, so good on you for knocking the bitch down a peg.


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