Submitted by Lana:
Alvin and I started talking online, and it progressed to the point of a date. At some point beforehand, I had told him that I love baking, and he asked me, "Will you bake something for me?"
I thought he was asking if I would bake something for him sometime, and I promised him that I would.
That weekend, we met inside of a local mall, and he asked, "So what'd you bake me? Is it back at your car?"
I told him that I didn't have anything, that I must have misunderstood.
He said, "What was there to misunderstand? You said that you were baking me something."
I told him, "I thought you meant that you wanted me to bake you something sometime."
He rolled his eyes and said, "Way to cover for forgetting. Never mind. A very convenient misunderstanding."
"Not really, since we're fighting about it now."
"Okay, just calm down."
What was he talking about? I was perfectly calm. He was the one getting agitated, all over a misunderstanding that anyone else would've laughed off.
I informed him, "I am calm."
He said, "Whoa... psycho girl. Bye, then," and left me standing there. Of course I'm better off, but if he could become that bitter over a misunderstanding involving baked goods, then I fear for whoever he ends up with.
*****************************
This is why he was upset.
4/08/2010
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I think it's very clear that he was asking you to bake him something for this date.
ReplyDeleteAnd, y'know, seeing as you're a woman, you should have baked him something regardless.
First?
back in the kitchen with ye!
ReplyDeleteYou are the person who said,
ReplyDelete"Not really, since we're fighting about it now."
His comment before that didn't sound like the start of the fight, so I blame you for being the instigator with YOUR comment about fighting.
I'm definitely hearing a "I'm a total bitch" tone in my head when I read the things you said to him. I'd be interested to hear the other side of this ABCOTD.
ReplyDeleteSide note: Bitch, you know you should have baked him some muffins!
^ I agree with everything The Architect just said.
ReplyDeleteI also love that the guy just left you standing there. I applaud him.
It WAS pretty obvious that he meant "would you bake me something for this upcoming date." Had he meant "would you bake me something sometime," he would have used the word *sometime*. Yes, a simple misunderstanding, but one that you definitely blew out of proportion. Although I DO think it's a bit presumptuous of him to expect you to bake him something (like a good little woman) for your first date.
ReplyDeleteAm i reading the same story here?
ReplyDeleteHe said, "What was there to misunderstand? You said that you were baking me something."
He rolled his eyes and said, "Way to cover for forgetting. Never mind. A very convenient misunderstanding."
It seems to me he was being a totaly dick, getting upset for not having a pineapple upside down cake waiting for him. Just think the life she would have had with him if they married, every day when he comes home the third degree about why dinner isnt ready, why arent you naked when he gets home, why no blowjobs during his lunch break.
Nikki, Why is it presumptuous of him to ask her to bake something and be a 'good little woman'?
ReplyDeleteSounds like you're looking for something to be offended about. He didn't 'expect' or presume anything, he asked. After she brought it up as something she LOVES doing. She could've easily said no. The Architect got it right.
I bet you and anon 2:12 are really fun to hang out with.
@2:12 - And she would be such a great woman to date? Constantly blowing things out of proportion, trying to manipulate her way through life. "Why am I expected to pick the kids up from school? I thought this morning when you asked, you meant 'Can I pick the kids up from school SOMETIME, not today! And now you're trying to pick a fight with me. Don't bother arguing, because I will get the last word regardless of what you say, then go bitch to my friends about the neglect and abuse I face with you daily."
ReplyDeleteThis girl's a bitch. She needs to get her ass back in the kitchen.
I kind of side with the guy on this one. OP, were you expecting another date after the first one? If not, why would you think he wanted you to bake him something SOMETIME? I would figure he meant for the first date. And he wasn't being sexist, as some comments imply, since the OP said she loved baking. I'm an avid baker and if someone wanted me to bake them something, I'd enjoy doing it for them. The OP also pushed the argument, since the guy tried to close the subject. I don't agree with his "psycho girl" comment, but I guess he just realized where the night was probably headed, and wanted to save himself from the experience.
ReplyDelete8:45 - The guy tried to close the argument in a very passive aggressive way. Neither of them are winners.
ReplyDelete11:42, I agree.
ReplyDeleteand 3:15, he got the last word in, she didnt. He said, "Whoa... psycho girl. Bye, then," and left me standing there.
So maybe he was a bitch and needs to get back in the kitchen.
2:57, I just thought it was presumptuous because, if a guy told me that he really enjoyed working on cars, I wouldn't ask him (before even meeting in person) if he would fix my car for a first date. If a girl told me that she really liked making jewelry, I wouldn't ask her to make me a set of earrings for our first date.
ReplyDeleteGet what I'm saying?
Nikki, I'm a fire spinner, and I love what I do. If a guy were to ask me to spin fire for him, I would think that he meant at the first (and perhaps only) time that I met him and had a date with him. I wouldn't have a problem with it, because it's cheap and doesn't take a really long time to set up and do. Same with something like jewelry making. If it's something small that doesn't require much money or effort on my or their part, I don't see the harm in asking. With jewelry making, if a guy said that his hobby was wood lathing and he made earlobe plugs, I may ask for a set of earrings to see how he does if it wouldn't be very expensive or time consuming. Baking is cheap, and doesn't take a whole lot of time.
ReplyDeleteNow if someone said their hobby was working on cars, it would probably be a while before I asked if he'd give my car a tune-up. Though I may be inclined to ask him to check my oil... ;-)
OP / 11:53, your date walked away from you, so you weren't able to get in the last word. Instead, you came to post it here to try and get sympathy. You're not getting any, so you keep coming back to defend yourself against random people on the internet. Your date made some sucky comments, and you have a sucky manipulative attitude. I fear for whomever ends up with you.
ReplyDelete10:07: really?! fire spinning?! u'd do that on a first date to try and impress a girl? man, i can't wait to see ur story posted here after u set the girl on fire.
ReplyDeleteAnd who'd want earlobe plugs made outta wood? gay.
Okay, 10:07, I get what you're saying. I just thought the whole date was weird, from him thinking "Sweet! free baked goods!" to her thinking "Sweet! I'll make baked goods in some far-off distant time yet to be determined!" and then they both fought (too bad not with knives) over which one of them was douchier. :P
ReplyDeleteHave you ever had someone ask you to spin fire on a first date? Because that might actually pretty cool... ;)
Yeah, I'm with Nikki and the pro "he's a douche" people. So what she misunderstood what he meant. His eye roll and "oh how convenient" comment were uncalled for. Call me sensitive, but she didn't HAVE to make him anything. What did he bring her for the date? Nothing? Exactly.
ReplyDeletelol 10:12 thinks 11:53 is the OP. I fear for anyone that knows you.
ReplyDelete11:04, you must have misread the many "he" "him" and "guy" references in my post. There wouldn't be any attempt to impress any girls. When I spin fire, it's myself that is at risk of catching on fire. I don't let people stand near me when I do it. And it's not wooden ear plugs that make me gay. It's the part about me enjoying dick in my ass / mouth that makes me gay.
ReplyDeleteNikki, no, it's usually the first couple of dates that a guy finds out that I spin fire. Though I met my last boyfriend when I was busking in a shopping center spinning fire. He enjoyed my show, but didn't tip. Shoulda' known he was cheap... hahaha.
-10:07
This was shaping up to be a pretty doomed date from the get-go. Internecine and no fun at all.
ReplyDeleteGuys, guys. You can't make a determination of blame or figure out who was being the crab first just from what's written here. You can speculate all you want but the fact is that none of you heard their tone of voice, and in terms of the dynamic and who caused what, that's a huge piece of the puzzle you're missing. Besides, you're only getting one side of it on this page. More than most of the dates here, this one could use the other person's version. I'm left with a nebulous set of events. Not only does it keep me from really understanding what happened, it also keeps me from sympathizing with the author.
ReplyDelete^^I agree. Get off your high horse. The whole point of this forum is to let us, the readers, pass rash judgments on the key players of the dates, jump to outrageous conclusions based solely on what we read and imagine from the text, and call each other "ghey" unnecessarily when we have nothing wittier to say. You're taking it all entirely too seriously.
ReplyDeleteAlso, 10:07 - Thanks for the follow-up! I always over-tip buskers to try and make up for the jerks in the audience who just want a free show/flaming hot piece of ass such as yourself. ;)
Nikki, on behalf of buskers everywhere, we thank you for our tips. It's what enables me to continue being an internet troll on ABCOTD. :-)
ReplyDeleteOh yeah, and paying rent, groceries, bad dates, and other entertainment (crack and hookers) too. Just kidding, I don't do crack.
-10:07 / 2:42 / 8:41
(at this point, I should probably just register at blogger...)
I'm going with the guy, I'd love to hear a rebuttal. And although they both seem like tools I still understand where the guy is coming from. He figured he was spending money on a ''date with OP'' so he wanted a nice gesture in return. OP went to the date without the baked goods and he felt let down, like he wasen't worth the time to bake something.
ReplyDeleteI can definitly see a bitchy tone coming from OP too.. She couldn't wiggle her ass in the kitchen but she'd wiggle her ass to get a free meal. Glad he didn't let that happen.