But He Can Tie His Shoelaces by Himself

Submitted by Dean:

Stacey was a single mom, and she made that clear from the get-go.  I didn't have any problem with that.  On the night of our date, she arranged for a sitter, we went out to a bar, did some dancing, some drinking, some kissing, and she asked me back to her place.  I asked her if it would be awkward since her kids and the sitter were there, and she said not to worry about it.  I was fully able to not worry.

We made it back to her house and there were her 3-year-old and 6-year-old watching TV.  The microwave door was open, the smell of something awful was in the air (burnt popcorn?), paint and glue splotches were everywhere, and piles of movies and books were all over the place, as if giant stacks of each had fallen.

She walked in as if nothing was wrong.  I asked her, "Where's the sitter?"

She turned to her 6-year-old.  "Where's my big man?" she asked.

"Here I am!" he piped up and turned around on the couch.

The sitter was her 6-year-old.  Something didn't seem quite right about this, and I asked her about it.  She said, "Oh, Thomas is more responsible than most kids twice his age."

I said, "Which would make him 12.  Still not a good idea to leave him by himself, and taking care of another one."

She became a bit defensive and said, "You don't know my kids, so I don't think you're in a position to judge."

I retorted, "I know that a 6-year-old has no business being a babysitter!"

We argued back and forth for a while, and things were awkward enough to necessitate me leaving.  It was years ago and I moved away from there, but I still can't help but think sometimes about that whole situation.

Could've been worse.
Or even worse.


  1. Yeah, telling someone how to parent their kids is usually not a good idea.

  2. But then, neither is felony child abandonment.

  3. @ 9:49, you are right. That is against the law. Someone needed to say something to her!

  4. OK, I'll be the first one to say it: this wasn't really a bad date was it? It sounds like you had a great date, then later found it that your date was an irresponsible mother. I can imagine there are a lot of dating, irresponsible single mothers out there..

    Jared: the link were really lame this time. Not funny.

  5. I think I could understand her leaving a 6 year old alone by himself for a bit but not a 3 year old, too much stuff could happen... I consider myself alone to be accident proned, I can only imagine a child in the home by themselves. He was right for not condoning such a thing, but in all reality, he should've told someone! Those kids don't need a mother who's more interested in her own social life then watching her kids.

  6. Really? Wow, this site has a bunch of snitches. She definitely has questionable parental judgement, but she is not abusing them. Who appointed you to be the deciding factor in parental judgement?

    So report it so they take her kids away. Then they go into foster care. Maybe they get abused or neglected and maybe they don't, but the taxpayers will pay for it. People need to just worry about themselves and their own lives. Stop snitchin on things that do not impact you!

  7. 11:58 - Agreed.

  8. 11:58: She made it his business. It's one thing to mind your own business, it's quite another to ignore a woman clearly abusing her children. "Minding your own business" might well be worse than foster care for both children.

  9. Congrats to the OP for actually stepping up and saying something. Let's think about this together for a second.....he was headed back to her place to most likely get some. He walks in the door and sees two kids sitting in the middle of what sounds like an explosion in an arts and crafts store. He knew speaking up would kill the obvious mood she was going for, but he did it. Now no one is talking about taking her kids away, but hopefully he shamed her into actually giving a damn.

  10. If he really cared about those kids, he could have shacked up with her and seen to it that they had a responsible step-dad. It probably wouldn't even have required exclusivity on his part.

  11. But she made little Timmy take CPR classes! Surely he can handle any qualms if his brother chokes on a cookie and he's unsuccessful reviving him. He's nearly in the first grade, after all. And he has to learn responsibility if he wants that hamster.

    I suppose now she has to hire a real electrician instead of making the 3-year-old rewire lamps.

  12. ^ Little shits shouldn't be eating cookies, now should they? Any good parent knows that. Those cookies are dangerous, and anyone that lets their kid eat one should have child protective services called on them. Think of the trans fats!

  13. Trans fats aren't real!

  14. Nanny Dearest3/24/2010 11:09 AM

    High-fructose corn syrup is killing the Youth of America!!!

    Also, her children probably wouldn't be taken away immediately. Child Services usually tries to work with the parent(s) to change their habits and make their home a less abusive/negligent one. From what I understand, foster care is for extreme situations and parents who don't learn.

  15. snitching? really... seriously, you're more worried about paying more for your taxes than the kid that ends up on the headlines in the newspaper that died at the age of 3 or however old due to neglect while mommy was tryin to hook up. all it takes is falling down the stairs or choking... needless to say, its not the six year old's job to raise his younger sibling because his mom wanted to spread her legs. a lot more could be going on in that house than what OP saw... and the kids don't automatically get taken away from their mother, social services would observe and report before taking the kids away. its a probationary thing. how much do you think the mother is really helping the kids if shes skipping out on them anyhow?

  16. @ Nanny

    As a child who has had the authorities called on her family, the children might have been removed from the house and put with other family members while things are sorted out with the negligent parent.

  17. I think it's funny how she says ''He is more responsible then kids twice his age''.. Yet theres a burnt smell in the air, the house looks like a tornado hit, etc..

    11:58 - Don't bring up that snioh bullshit, there are laws for a reason and leaving a 6 and 3 year old alone by themselfs is as bad as leaving them in a car all day.. Neglect.. and using the 'Snitch' card is as lame as pulling the 'race' card.. If you think this is Ok then you should probably wait until you have kids of your own (if its not to late..)

  18. This is child abandonment. In all 50 states it is illegal to leave a 6year old alone. Next time call the cops.


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