When Discrimination is Okay

Submitted by Travis:

Beth told me, over the phone before we met, that she used to be a flight attendant who was unlawfully fired from her job, and was thusly involved in some sort of litigation against her former airline employers.  I asked her why they had fired her, but she was a bit vague on that point.  Something about discrimination.

Well, it couldn't have been weight discrimination.  The girl, according to her online photos, was a bit of a knockout.  Maybe a couple of extra pounds, but a even those were in all the right places.  We set up a date.

Wouldn't you know it, she showed up and she was as big as a papa moose.  Those photos must have been of her hot younger sister, or taken a few thousand donuts in the past.  She seemed injection-molded into her skintight jeans, and her gut rolled over the top of them, like too much ice cream in a teeny tiny cone.

The confusion and disappointment must have been apparent, because her first statement to me was, "You seem disappointed and confused."

My response was, "No shit.  You don't look a thing like your pictures!"

This made her mad.   "Why does that matter?  Why do you have to be so superficial?  It's what's inside that counts!"

I said, "So we've already established that you're a liar on the inside, and we've known each other in person for less than a minute."

She muttered, "Fuck this," turned, and took off.

I was going to call after, "I'd rather not," but I didn't. 


  1. I cannot imagine what people like her were thinking. If you're faking your picture to ensure you won't be turned down in advance, imagine how you feel when you're turned down in person. And if you don't get turned down straight ahead, all you gained was an akward date.

    @Travis: props for telling her straight off what was the matter. Better than sitting through the date like a fool. Still, the "I'd rather not" wasn't necessary at the end of your post.

  2. Actually, I think his date was superficial. If she sent him photos of a different person, and then showed up as someone entirely different, then SHE's the one with the issue.

    Whether people like to admit it or not, physical attraction is important - it's been psychologically proven to be the first point of attraction.

    So no, he's not "superficial as fuck." I would have turned heel and ran if a guy did that to me too.

  3. Boring. Seen this story thousands of times.

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  5. I actually liked the "I'd rather not" at the end, especially since he was tactful enough not to say it out loud to her but rather think it.

    And I agree that lying about your appearance just sets you up for heartbreak at the actual date. And I don't think it's superficial to be angry about being lied to like that. Some people (most people?) are not attracted to obese or really large men and women. That's not superficial; that's their preference. This date would have gone differently if Travis HAD been attracted to larger women, and the "big reveal" had been a pleasant surprise.

    He's not a douche for not being immediately attracted to someone who isn't even confident enough with herself that she has to post someone else's pictures to her online profile.

  6. Sounds like she got fired because for whatever reason (personal, emotional, medical maybe) her weight ballooned at some point. You don't see many "overweight flight attendants" male or female. The one guy I did see who was sporting a gut actually spoke 11 languages; a good reason to keep him around haha! But yeah, this chica was burned by the job loss and probably CONTINUES to blame EVERYTHING on it rather than deal with the cause of it all.

  7. Haha, I love how she notices that he's disappointed right away - which obviously gives away the fact that she knows that she doesn't look anything like the photo she sent.

    And yet she chose to send him that picture, to pretend she looks better than she does. That's at least as superficial as Travis.. actually: more so - seeing as all he's doing is claiming his right to date people he actually finds attractive.

  8. Ya done right and handled it perfectly.
    I was in the same situation and, stupidly, continued with the date pretending all was well. She noticed disappointment in my face when we met, but I lied...and I still kick myself to this day for wasting my time that night KNOWING nothing would ever come out of it...(pun intended)
    Oh and props for the Papa Moose comment! hahahahaha

  9. My cousin's a flight attendant for Southwest Airlines, and they have policies in place about what shade of *lipstick* you're allowed to wear, how long/short your hair is allowed to be, the types of facial hair you're allowed to have, so it's not surprising that she was fired for going over their weight limit. Plus, if there was a need to evacuate everyone from the plane, I'm sure the passengers would have a hard time squeezing past her to get out of the emergency exits. :P

  10. Why is it that every time this happens (and it happens, possibly 5 times a minutes, somewhere in the world) someone is right there to brand the surprised party "superficial"/"douchebag".

    Someone who posts a picture of someone else in order to fool anyone in to a date is a liar. Plain and simple. A far worse trait than being superficial.

    Just because you're fat or ugly doesn't mean you deserve a pass for lying.

    End fat/ugly entitlement.

  11. "we've already established that you're a liar on the inside".... good one, way to keep it real. Might have been hard to hear, but maybe it'll teach her a lesson.

  12. Just curious, but isn't ALL dating superficial to begin with? There is a reason you approach the girl at the bar or party, a reason you want to talk to that guy in the store, its called looks. Don't get me wrong, I've dated some people who weren't all that hot because they had a good personality and we hit it off, but there was still something about them that I found physically attractive. A great connection with a person you aren't physically attracted to is called a good friend. A relationship with no chemistry and no spark is doomed to fail. I think he handled it well and was up front, unlike the date.

  13. Some people justify dated, nicer-looking photos as being a test of whether their date is more interested in sex than companionship. In this case, the author failed. But you have to ask yourself what's more important - being man enough to get through a disappointing date, or being simply honest about yourself. I vote for honesty, though the author could have had more class.

  14. I definitely think this poster is an ahole. Fat whale-pigs should never be discriminated against. Just fed.

    Then fed some more.

  15. Right, so if you want to avoid dating someone who's superficial, why not just send current, realistic pictures of yourself in the first place?


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