What Happens When You Dumpster Dive

Submitted by Nikki:

I had spent a few weeks flirting with Will, another commuter student, when we finally decided to go out on a date. He had that “bad boy” look going on, and I was young and simple. He told me that he’d pick me up at 7:00 and to “Wear something nice,” with a little wink and grin.

I was wearing a plaid miniskirt, a cute (more tasteful) top, and platform sandals when he stopped by. He smiled and gave his approval, and off we went… to his parents’ house for dinner.

It was a tasty dinner, and his parents were polite, but it was obvious that he had issues with them, as he spent most of the meal making snide comments and rolling his eyes at their expense.

After dinner, he said he was taking me out “somewhere fun… and a little dangerous.” Finally! I got to cash in on that bad boy attitude of his! So we drove through backstreets to… the back of a Goodwill store. To go dumpster diving.

“They get really pissed at you if they catch you going through their trash,” he said. “But you can always find some really great stuff here, as long as you’re willing to dig a little for it. And don’t worry, they don’t put rotting food or anything in here, so it’s pretty clean for a dumpster.”

I figured “What the hell. I’m already here,” so he gave me some gym shorts he had lying in his backseat, which I put on for modesty’s sake, and… we went dumpster diving. I got a couple of cute bowls, and at one point, he held onto my ankles while I reached in farther to grab a set of golf clubs he wanted.

“Do you wanna get coffee somewhere?” he asked.

“I don’t really drink coffee, but I wouldn’t mind hanging out a little longer," I replied.

“Great. I know where we can get some good coffee, and they might have hot chocolate or something for you.”

So we drove to… a church. For his Narcotics Anonymous meeting. Because he was a recovering heroin addict (one month sober).

It was pretty awkward, as I was still straight-edge at the time and therefore, had no real reason to be at an NA meeting, so I just introduced myself as Will’s friend.

After the meeting, he drove me home, and we kissed.

We went out a few more times, on some slightly better dates (I always wore jeans after that), but I wasn’t really emotionally mature enough to date a recovering addict, so I broke it off with him and asked if we could be “just friends.”

To say he didn’t take it well is an understatement. He made posters about me and what a bitch I was (yes, we were in college) and posted them around the commuter lounge and nearby student café.

He later started dating another recovering addict, and they both fell off the wagon; he blamed it on me dumping him.


  1. Wow!!!
    Oh my gawd!!!!
    I can't believe this story...I really can't!!!
    I mean, C'MON!!!
    A plaid miniskirt with platform sandals?

  2. Hey, I didn't know that about Goodwill dumpsters! Thanks!

  3. You Yanks are so classy, "and off we went… to his parents’ house for dinner." - Trailer park by any chance?

  4. Fabricated.

  5. Not fabricated, although I sincerely wish it were. Hell, there are a LOT of aspects of my late high school/early college life/personality I wish I could erase from memory...like my wardrobe choices. ;D

    And his parents were pretty loaded, so it wasn't a trailer park either...and I don't know why you'd make the leap that if someone brings a date to their parents' house, they obviously live in a trailer park. Does that mean that only poor people are cheap/close with their parents?

  6. Seriously, a plaid miniskirt and platform sandals? Tough break for the dude.

    On a side note... Man, I really wish a girl would ask me out dumpster diving some time.

  7. Nikki, the comment about living in a trailer park was because you went dumpster diving! What person actually does that!

  8. 3:56...Anon 12:15 didn't mention the dumpster diving as a reason for asking if we were from a trailer park. It only commented on us going to his parents' house for dinner. If the anon had mentioned the dumpster diving, then oh yeah, I would have gotten the trailer park reference. Sorry I didn't make that great logical leap. ;)

  9. perfect opportunity to get stoned, NA is where all the good dope is.

  10. Dumpster diving is a popular hobby around here. Avoiding detection of course, but still digging around. I recently snagged 9 old radiators, that paid $120 bucks at the scrap yard.


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