The Not-So-Fresh Prince

Submitted by Natassia:
I met Michael online, and we decided to meet up.  We went to a restaurant and it seemed to be going okay, but not well. He wasn't what I expected from the photos, and I didn't dig the caterpillar of a unibrow that he sported above his eyes.
He seemed nice enough until he started rapping the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air in the middle of the restaurant.  I pleaded with him to stop and told him that it was embarrassing, but he just said "No it's not, it's funny."
We continued talking and at one point I said that I had university exams the following month (it was July and courses were over back in April) because I had to have them deferred. He laughed and said that I must have had them deferred because I was lazy or just didn't study hard enough.  I just simply said, "No that's not it."
He kept going on and on about how lazy I was, and then I said "No, it's because my father died."
He just stopped and said, "Now I feel like an asshole."
I said "Well you should."  
I only wish this was the end of it, but alas, it wasn't.  After I said, "I am so tired that I am going to sleep like a baby," he made stupid jokes, like "You want to sleep with babies? Eeew."  Then he threw even more lovely baby jokes at me, asking me over and over if I wanted to sleep with babies.
We got the check and left, and he dropped me off.  I went inside and he messaged me on messenger, asking if I'd like to go out again. I said "No."
He asked me "Why?"
I then gave him some advice about how to not to make an ass of himself in public, how not to make wild assumptions about people, and in general how not to behave on a first date.
To that, he said, "You aren't like most women, they like that stuff."  Oh yeah?  Go ahead and try that on them.


  1. Up until the baby part, you sounded like a cold prude. I hate people who make dumb little jokes like that, though.

  2. aw yeah man, I love the way you embarrass me in public. So hot.

  3. Looks like somebody signed up for a really bad dating video.

  4. Most women like that stuff? Really, is that why your single?

  5. I think you were a bit hard on him at some points but I don't think ANY girl likes the stuff he was doing.

  6. If some guy started singing the theme song to Fresh Prince and made immature baby jokes, I would probably freak out on him and start telling him how annoying he is. This guy wasn't polite, so why should you be?

    But really, you should have explained right off the bat that you failed your tests because your father died rather than having him guess why, leading you getting offended. That was just stupid and easily could have been avoided.

  7. Rule #1: The camera adds glamor, 6-packs and Brad Pitts face to every guy. And huge tits and flexibility to a girls body.

    Rule #2: When he said something about babies, you should've called him out as a molestor. "Eww.. you look just like that guy in the papers who was caught molesting a 4 year old.. not you, right?" Saying that loudly would've got the message

  8. Sounds like the guy was just nervous. Young, and nervous.

  9. All his research on women - and for what!!


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