That Cheatin' Heart

Submitted by Sean:

Lauren contacted me on a dating site and I took her out to a nice dinner.  Afterward we took a walk along a nearby river.

"I have ADD," she told me.  I assured her that this was fine.

She said, "I've had some other medical problems."  I again assured her that I would be understanding.

She went on to say, "I've cheated on every boyfriend that I've had, but I guess on the plus side, I haven't had too many boyfriends.  I think I'm just wired to want to fool around."

I then told her that I wouldn't feel comfortable entering into a relationship with someone if I'd be constantly afraid that she would be cheating on me.  Then she rolled her eyes and shook her head and said, "I knew you wouldn't be able to handle me."

This pissed me off and I stopped walking.  "What do you expect me to say, Lauren?  'If we end up exclusive and you cheat on me then that's okay'?  No, it's not okay.  I'm not going to enter into something if I think that she's always going to be looking for someone else."

She retorted, "That's how everyone works!  I just admit it."

I said, "It's how a LOT of people work, but it's not how EVERYONE works.  Just because a lot of people do it doesn't mean that I'm going to support it if my girlfriend does it."

She said, "You seemed like such a nice guy online."

"And you seemed like a girl who wouldn't think that cheating on a boyfriend is 'just something I'd have to understand.'"

"Now you want to punish me for what I did in the past?  Fuck you!"

She sped ahead, and my instinct told me to follow her, but I realized after taking a few steps that I was being let off easy.


  1. Unreal, she was acting like you were the one w/the problem. Looks like you doged a MAJOR bullet on that one.

  2. This one needs a congressional hearing.I'll lobby for it.

  3. This sounds like a classic case of miscommunication, not that Sean did anything wrong. Lauren was probably trying to get Sean to read between the lines: she hadn't had many boyfriends, therefore was somewhat unspoiled. She had cheated before, therefore she was exciting and would add a sexy element of danger (and also was asserting her independence in case Sean wanted to get too serious too soon). She wasn't expecting to get called on being unfaithful, obvious from her kneejerk reaction putting Sean down for "not being able to handle" her. I'd say she really was inexperienced, but perhaps not the daring cheater she made herself out to be.

  4. That's just not something you say right away to read between its lines.

  5. You dumbass, she was telling you up front she wanted non-commital sex. "Friends with benefits"
    She is definitly right on with "you can't handle her" women are not property.


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