Gone Baby Gone

Submitted by Ben:

Kristen came across as shy at first, but once I found some interesting topics, she would be talkative. We met at a party and seemed to hit it off.

I asked her out to dinner at a Chinese place, and thought it would be nice to take a walk first. On our way there, we passed some street musicians. I was in the middle of a sentence when she suddenly broke away and started dancing to their banjo music.

I'm all for being fun and free-spirited, but this was a little rude. For now, I let it go.

After her 5-minute dance session, she returned to me, telling me how much fun it was. We continued on to dinner, and passed a store with pig heads hanging in the window. She ran to look at them, amazed.

When I caught up to her, she turned to me and said, "I love shit like this."

"Dismembered pigs?" I asked. She didn't answer.

We were very nearly at the restaurant, when we came upon a crowd of people, all yelling and cheering, but I couldn't see what it was all about. I turned to Kristen, but she had disappeared.

I looked through the crowd and even called out for her, but she was nowhere to be seen. I walked a block away and tried her phone. No answer.

I kept looking for her, probably for another forty minutes, but she was gone.


  1. So let me make sure that I have this down... you never even MADE it to dinner? Wow.

  2. This man CLEARLY does not have a sense of adventure. He could have joined her in the dancing, or shared some of his own odder amusements, but no.
    Her last disappearing act was obviously an escape from a bland, bad date.

  3. @ Anon 12:22
    There is a fine line between having a sense of adventure on a date, and being flighty. At least finish listening to a sentence before going and dancing to the banjos.

  4. Obviously she was bored with you. You are boring. For future dates, be interesting and maybe they will not run away from you.

  5. She probably left with the pig head to live a happy life ever after.

  6. You had a lucky escape there, doesn't sound like you're boring, there's adventurous and there's unhinged.

  7. You are boring. She bailed on you before it got any worse for her. Good for you both.

  8. I have a feeling you were just too boring for her. She probably started dancing so you would stop your boring conversation.

  9. You sound like you make to do lists before dates. You weren't compatible anyway.


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