Sort of Glad That I Didn't Try for First Base

Submitted by Sherv:

So I met this girl at a night club a couple weeks ago. I thought she was cute and even though I wasn't sure she was my type we seemed to have a few things in common so we decided to meet up for drinks that Sunday evening.

We had some pretty good chats and she seemed insightful and outgoing so we decided to go on a second date which was drinks at my apartment the following Wednesday at 9.

When she called to set up the date she said "Let's get drunk tonight at your place," and that sounded like a recipe for a fantastic evening.

She showed up with a bottle of Vodka and I had the orange juice so the screwdrivers commenced immediately. She started telling me stories about how she goes out drinking every weekend and she loves to do shots. She asked me to do shots with her but I’m not a shots kind of guy so I decided to just keep with my drink. She did one shot. Then two. And we both kept drinking and chatting for the next few hours.

A few minutes after midnight her sister called to say there is some issue with their dad; she started freaking out and picked up her keys and said that she had to drive home. I told her that I couldn’t let her drive since we had been drinking for a few hours, but if she chilled for a bit I’d set the alarm for 3am and she could drive then when she was sober enough.

So she lied down and relaxed and proceeded to snatch all three of my pillows and my blanket and passed out. After a little while, she woke up, went to the bathroom, and then came back to collapse back on the bed.  She started snoring at a decibel level that was absolutely hard to imagine. I mean bed-shaking, foundation-rumbling snoring.

After laying there wide awake for 3 hours imagining how tired I was going to be at work the next day, I finally woke her up and said “I can’t sleep at all, you are snoring incredibly loud.”

She responded “I’ll put a pillow over my head.” I told her that I didn’t think that was going to work and that I would walk her to her car.

She got up, grabbed her bottle of Vodka and her bag, I walked her to her car and she drove home. Date over.

My roommate sent me a text message before I woke up the next morning to ask me what happened to the bathroom. I woke up and went in there to see what was wrong, and that’s when I saw the vomit all over the toilet and bathroom floor. She had puked everywhere!

She apologized over and over again the next day, but for all intents and purposes, she was already absolutely and permanently banned from my home. When I have to clean vomit before I go to work… there really can’t be a 3rd date.


  1. You get a ton of pity points for the vomit, that is unfortunate. However... you're sort of a douchebag for the rest. You guys were drinking, this woman had some sort of emergency, and you stopped her from driving. Awesome on you. But instead of trying to offer her some other way to get to where she needs to be (call a friend, call a taxi, etc.), you offer her a long nap in your bed. Now we start to verge over into douchebaggery, but you can still have the benefit of the doubt. Maybe you're broke and maybe she doesn't have any friends. So after just a tiny bit of sleep, her snoring bothers you so much that you wake her and put her into that car. For snoring, you're willing to send her on her way? Chief, that's what happens when people sleep over. Some people snore. Some people toss and turn. If you were that concerned about sleep, you should have found a way to get her home safe and sober hours earlier. If work is such a concern, maybe you don't spend the night drinking in the first place. You're the host, you could have called an end to the drinking at any point, maybe around the point where she was getting too drunk to drive. If you don't cut her off when it's just the two of you, than vomit in the bathroom is the price you pay. Also, if she was secretly vomiting and snoring loudly, you must have been at least somewhat aware that she was pretty wasted. Three hours sleep and you're waking her and pushing her into her car? That's how you lose all the goodwill points for taking her keys earlier. You are a good guy, so long as it doesn't inconvenience you at all. Frankly, if you took out the vomit thing and she submitted the story, I would say the bad date was you.

  2. Completely agree with anon #1.

  3. Drinkers suck. They deserve the crappy situations that come with the activity. Their stories suck, too, as I don't care about anyone if they're all getting druck.

  4. #1 is so right

  5. Agree with anon number one. Imagine it the other way around with you overly wasted.

    And anon number three... Just don't read them.

  6. Also agree with the first comment. Douchebag.


Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.

Content Policy

A Bad Case of the Dates reserves the right to publish or not publish any submitted content at any time, and by submitting content to A Bad Case of the Dates, you retain original copyright, but are granting us the right to post, edit, and/or republish your content forever and in any media throughout the universe. If Zeta Reticulans come down from their home planet to harvest bad dating stories, you could become an intergalactic megastar. Go you!

A Bad Case of the Dates is not responsible for user comments. We also reserve the right to delete any comments at any time and for any reason. We're hoping to not have to, though.

Aching to reach us? abadcaseofthedates at gmail dot com.