At Least the Food Was Okay

Submitted by Ellen:

Dan and I were out at a yacht club where he was a member.  We sat outside and he lit up a cigar.  The smoke blew in my face and I waved it away.

He asked "This bothering you?"

I nodded, and he shifted his chair to the left, which did absolutely nothing to stop the smoke from continuing to blow my way.  He said "You know, I was almost a doctor."

"I'm almost impressed," I said, just joking.

He went on "But the faculty were all assholes.  They're still in the nineteenth century.  Patients need to be treated like people, not medical equipment."

I said, "I don't think that all doctors are like that."

"Well, all lawyers are."

"Excuse me?"

He took a big puff from his cigar.  Ugh.  "Lawyers," he went on "They're a bunch of assholes."

I said "My brother's a lawyer."

"Is he an asshole?"

I didn't know how to respond, so I raised my glass.  "Cheers."

"To not being assholes" he said, clinking my glass.

I didn't see him after that.  Asshole.


  1. I don't know about your brother, but generally, lawyers all do seem to be pompous douches. But this guy also seems random and weird, at least according to your story.

  2. Why didn't you see him after that? It sounds like you two hit it off pretty well. Or are you really that sensitive?


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