Hottest Halloween on Record

Story Sent in by Dan:

I had been with Frieda for around two months when we decided to do a couples costume for a Halloween party to which we had been invited. She would go as a Pokémon trainer and I would go as a Pokémon. Seemed simple enough to me. I went as the fiery Charmander and met her at the party.

One of the first things she said to me was, "You look nothing like Charmander." That was incorrect. I had the orange skin, a full-head hat that was the spitting image of the beast (my face poked out through the mouth), and even the flaming tail. I was Charmander through and through. I looked like him. Hell, even people we passed by said, "Oh my god, it's Charmander." Rest assured that I looked like Charmander.

Frieda, though, was in a rotten mood and nothing could change her opinion. She said that I "ruined Halloween" and "should just go home." I had no intent of doing either of those things and I urged her to enjoy the night.

For my part, I had fun. There was punch, party games, and lots of fun people in creative costumes. I drank a bit and apparently, so did Frieda. The night culminated with her sidling up to me in what I thought was a late attempt at affection. But when she held a lit lighter up to my hat, I dodged away and demanded an explanation.

She yelled, "You don't look like Charmander and now the only way you will is with actual fire! Hold still!" She chased me with the lighter and I had to run out of the party. Someone yelled, "Run, Charmander, run!" You didn't have to tell me twice. I ran down the street and lost sight of Frieda.

Thinking myself safe, I wandered around a little bit before returning to the party. I was greeted warmly by the party attendees and there was no sign of Frieda. I went back to having a good, if guarded, time.

About a half-hour after I had returned, however, Frieda showed up, darted right at me from across the room, and tried to light me on fire again. She said, "Hold still! Charmander is a fire Pokémon!"

This time, I was able to grab her lighter away from her. She hit at me to get it back but I wasn't having it. As she hit at me she yelled, "You ruined this whole night! I should be able to kill you to get back at you for it! Give me the lighter!"

She stumbled a bit and almost landed on the floor. A few people came over and guided her to a couch. She promptly threw up all over it and that's around when I stopped having fun. I went home on my own and when she reached out to me the next day, and the couple of days thereafter, I didn't respond.


  1. OP dodged a bullet - I heard her stance on STDs was "gotta catch 'em all!"

  2. Fun Fact: My shark costume is flame retardant but my butt isn't.

  3. OP didn't realise in the first two months how crazy she was? Or perhaps he did, but it took some times before the drawbacks of dating a crazy (like the possibility of dying) outweigh the benefits (crazy sex)...

  4. Definition of a Mean Drunk.
    I want to know when she reached out, did she apologize for trying to killOP, or did she forget the whole evening.

  5. Gotta get your fill of that crazy sex before you get rid



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