Key, Myself, and I

Story Sent in by Ellen:

When I was out on my first date with Chris he told me he wanted to show me a magic trick. He asked me for my house key and I gave it to him, thinking it was just for fun. Then he asked me for my address. I gave him a fake one (I used a made-up street that doesn't exist in my town) and then he dropped the key down his pants. "See you later," he said with a wink.

I wanted my house key back (although I kept a spare hidden outside) but I also wanted to get away from this creep as fast as possible. I played coy for a bit and made as if I forgot about my key altogether. I hope he had a great time trying to find that non-existent street I gave him. I was sure to block him on everything as soon as I made it home. Not long after I also changed the lock for good measure.


  1. I like how OP thought she was clever and coy and got one over on her bad date but sorry to say, not so clever. When you give a complete stranger your house key then have to change the locks to your house, that is not being slick. What I'm wondering is, how long did op wait to change the locks? I am curious why op didn't demand the key back before they parted ways? Will my WTF's be answered?!

    1. Or lie, and say" by the way, that's my brother's house key".
      Or "if you don't return it, I'll ask the manager to call the cops."
      OP, your house key is as private as your bank account number. A quarter would work as well as a key for a magic trick.

    2. If you are on a date with someone who asks for your key for a magic trick, you aren't going to assume that they are going to shove it down their pants. Maybe the trick requires a key. Who knows? But you can't fault the OP for assuming that her date was a normal person. A house key is akin to an account number? That's a huge exaggeration. A house key is useless if you don't know where the person lives/if they change the locks. It's amazing how people bend over backwards to blame the victim.

  2. How OP managed to keep her face from screwing up into revulsion at the sight of her house key dropping onto his pants is beyond me. I would never have wanted that house key back and the cost of changing the locks would have been well worth it because I'd never have to touch that key again.


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