Arbitrary Ranking System

Story Sent in by Maureen:

We were at a bar. After a drink, Thomas said to me, "You're a nine-point-two, easy. Maaaaaaaybe a nine-point-three."

"Thank you," I replied.

He said, "Do you wanna know what you gotta do to be a 10?"

I said, "I think I'm pretty good the way I am. Thanks."

He asked, "You don't want to become a better person? You think you're perfect?"

"I like who I am. A nine-point-two is good. Or so I'd say if your arbitrary ranking system mattered to me."

"Yeah, but you wanna know what you gotta do to be a 10?"

"I'm good."



He said, "I'll show you, anyway." He stood, pulled a wrinkled pamphlet out of his pocket, slid it over to me, finished his drink, threw some money down, and walked right out of there.

I picked up the pamphlet. It was a Jehovah's Witness brochure.


  1. I feared "give me head" might be it. Whew! A Jesus Freak, not a perv.

  2. That... that is not what I was expecting.

    I can't tell if I'm relieved or disappointed.

  3. What a twist! Move over, M Night Shyamalan - you have been dethroned by JESUS.


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