Lord of Dorkness

(2014's best films? On this week's Jared's Inkwell! -JMG)

Story Sent in by Lorraine:

My first date with Herman was the day after my birthday. He gave me a little wrapped gift and I opened it.

It was a creepy little unpainted wooden figurine with big eyes, a huge mouth, and thick legs - like some sort of demonic clown.

"Happy birthday from me," he said, "and Emperor Satan."

His profile had listed his religion as "Other," but I wasn't expecting this.

Frightened out of my wits, I told Herman, "Thank you."

He said, "Thank Emperor Satan, too."

"Thanks... Emperor Satan."

Pleasantries out of the way, we went to dinner. It was otherwise normal. He was very pleasant and polite and even paid for the meal. When I thanked him for it, I was afraid he'd again encourage me to thank the emperor, but he didn't. In fact, he was gentlemanly for the rest of the night. We even made out a little in my car. But neither of us reached out to the other again, after that.


  1. "We even made out a little in my car" Well, he is a Satan worshiper, but......he was also pretty cute.This is how Rosemary got into trouble guys.

  2. Scaring women into giving out sexual favors is the only way to go!

  3. That's what you get for going out with Herman


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