Truffle Shuffle

Story Sent in by Steven:

In high school I was out on a first date with Doris. We were at the mall and I had just taken her out to dinner. We passed by a Godiva Chocolate store and I asked her if she wanted to go in, thinking that perhaps I could buy us a couple of truffles.

Once inside, I told her to pick out a truffle but she set her eyes on the boxes up on the shelves... the boxes that were something like $80 each. She grabbed one off a shelf and hugged it to herself. "I want this one."

I said, "I don't know if I'm that hungry. I was thinking we could just get a couple of truffles."

She asked, "You won't buy this for me?"

I told her, "No, but I did pay for dinner. And I'll buy you a truffle. Come on over and pick one."

She shoved the box back on the shelf and stormed out of the store. I ordered two truffles and followed her out.

She was at the railing and I handed her a truffle. "I bought one for you."

"I don't want your stupid truffle," she said.

Feeling bad for her uneaten truffle, I ate them both. So good.

She stepped away from me and asked, "You seriously won't buy me that box?"

I said, "It was more than twice the cost of dinner."

"I want it!" she yelled, then kicked at the glass railing, "What's so hard about that?"

"I bought you a truffle, but you didn't want it. I'm supposed to buy you dozens?" I said.

"Give it to me," she demanded.

"I ate it," I admitted.

She screamed and kicked at the railing again. It was my cue to exit, so I mumbled something like, "See you in school," and left her fuming there.

I did see her in school and it was a little awkward at first, but she grew up a bit more over the months and we eventually became vague friends. Wasn't expecting to, but I guess that's how it happens, sometimes.


  1. I'll bet she was wearing that new perfume I've heard so much about.

    Also, what the hell is a "vague friend"?

  2. An acquaintance?

  3. ^No, an acquaintance is an acquaintance. Maybe it means a frenemy?

  4. Throwing a tantrum. Over candy. Looks like a bad case of Eternal Infancy


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