The Glassy Knoll

Story Sent in by Cynthia:

Paul was an athlete who played lots of baseball. At dinner, he filled my ears with tales of his storied career. He promised that after dinner, he'd show me some moves.

Once we were done with dinner, he led me outside. I figured that he had a ball and bat with him in his car, but he apparently didn't. We walked down the road to a house with a big front yard and walked right onto the lawn.

I asked him, "Where are we going?"

He said, "I promised I'd show you my moves. Check it out." He pulled out a glass he had stolen from the restaurant.

"You're going to use a glass?" I asked, incredulous.

He tossed the glass into the air and slapped at it with his hand. The glass flew onto the lawn. He scooped it up and did the same thing, hitting it once more. Again, it banked off his hand and landed in the grass.

For his next trick, he tossed it higher into the air, leaped up, and slammed it with his head. Amazingly, the glass again didn't break when it hit the ground.

But Paul's head was in bad shape. His hands went to it and he nearly buckled over. "Ow!" he said "Ow, ow, ow!"

I helped him back to his car and despite his non-stop moaning and groaning he somehow drove away.

As for me, my car was close by so I drove back to that front yard, found the glass, and returned it to the restaurant before driving home.

I wrote Paul once to ask him if he was okay. He replied that he was and asked me out again. I declined.


  1. Seems Paul missed one essential fact about sharing one's non-pro sports career.

  2. Kinda surprised you didn't just throw the glass out; pretty sure they get those on the cheap, as bars and restaurants go through tons of glassware You're definitely a finer citizen than I.


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