(I exchanged a few words with Breaking Bad's Vince Gilligan last week. Click here to read his sage advice on storytelling on this week's Jared's Inkwell! -JMG)

Story Sent in by Elenora:

After a string of unexciting dates, Gary came along. He was funny, nice, and was the first guy in a long time with whom I actually wanted to have a second date.

I didn't hear from him the first day after our date, but the second day, he texted me, "Second date or I kill you."

I guessed he was kidding around but it wasn't really the best way to ask me. I wrote back, "Second date sounds good. No threats required! :)"

He texted back, after an hour or so, "Kill you? Don't mind if I do!"

I didn't write back to that as I failed to find the humor. He subsequently wrote me, "WHATS YOUR ADDRESS SO I CAN KILL?" and "KILLKILLKILLKILLKILL!" I didn't pay them much mind.

However, a few days later, when the word "KILL" showed up carved into the wood right above my front doorknob, I called the police and made a report. It was five years ago. I'm still living in the same place and I'm not dead.


  1. Yeah... this is why Chunky Horse doesn't usually get second dates...

  2. Everyone who is still dating should be using this site for the most basic of lessons -- do not let a first date know where you live !! Yikes!

  3. @La Marchlewski-how do we know she let him know where she lived? It's real easy to find someone's address online with very little information.

  4. La Marchlewski - I LOLed at "Everyone who is still dating". You see, ABCotD is only for the survivors of the dating process - that's why so many of us are obviously still suffering from shellshock. ;-)

  5. I think he's just had that Huey Lewis and the News album on repeat for the past 5 years.

  6. Worth the risk for a free dinner.

  7. Tammy--- *sigh* You are right - A name is often enough to find the address. You can tell I'm older when I forget that stuff. LOL Wolfdream - mmhm, another great point - PSDD - post traumatic dating disorder. (eye twitch)


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