On Your Knees

Story Sent in by Terrence:

One October, I arranged a first date with Alisha. I was usually out of work early on Fridays, and so I asked her if we could meet on a Friday. She then requested the forthcoming Thursday, instead. That also worked and we made it a definite.

I waited outside a restaurant to meet her. She shuffled over to me, down the sidewalk... on her knees. She had knee pads and a pink ribbon on and tottered over, finally looking up at me and saying, "Hi, Terrence!"

"Hi... why are you on your knees?"

"Breast cancer awareness. For 24 hours. I'm sponsored."

I asked, "Why did you want to meet up today? Moving around will likely be... a little awkward."

She said, "I can walk just fine. Just not on my feet. Is it going to embarrass you?"

It wasn't going to, at least I didn't think it would. But no one else was walking around on their knees, and I had a weird feeling that everyone who watched us enter the restaurant thought that I had made her do it or something like that. To her credit, she informed the hostess and the waitress that it was for breast cancer awareness. Still, I suppose it was a little embarrassing.

At dinner, she was impassioned about her personal experience, how two of her friends had been diagnosed, and how important it was for her to raise money for the cause. I was moved, and even though she didn't ask, I ultimately gave her $10 to support her efforts.

Her eyes lit up when I gave her the money and she thanked me. Was she a little too eager?

The answer came after we paid for dinner. Once the check had been paid, she stood up on her own two feet, said, "So long," and practically ran out.

I thought about chasing her down, but decided she wasn't worth it. After all, I wasn't about to beat her up for $10. Leave that to someone else.


  1. $10 AND a free meal. If that's not worth a beat down, then I don't know what is.

    Also, I'm sponsoring an EVS awareness event. See, first you get down on your hands and knees....

  2. Sometimes if that's what it costs to never see that person again, it's worth it.

  3. Dear lord, what is she DOING hosing down chumps for $10 and a meal? This girl could make a fortune as a sales rep for the pharmaceutical industry!

  4. That is a lot of commitment for and extra $10.

  5. I usually find turning up for a date with knee pads cures my EVS very quickly.

  6. You should have turned the dinner date into a walk in the park instead. See how long she would have kept it up.

  7. I'm hard up, but I'd never think about beating someone up for $10. Really dude?


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