Mouth Wide Shut

Story Sent in by Dave:

It was a normal-seeming first date with Gayle. We were at a diner. I was attentive when she spoke, and she seemed into what I was saying. She was in the middle of telling me about her cat when suddenly her mouth clamped shut.

Of course, I first asked her if she was okay. Her mouth remained closed as she moaned and groaned. I asked her again. She seemed to not be able to open her mouth.

I handed her a piece of paper and a pen, and she wrote, My mouth won't open!

I asked her, "What can I do?"

She wrote, You'll have to order for me.

I told her, "I meant, can I get you some medicine or call an ambulance? How serious is this?"

"Very serious," she said.

I replied, "It can't be that serious, since you just spoke."

"Damn it!" she said, then ran out on me without another word.

I left soon afterward. Was it something I said?


  1. This one is simple. Gayle, tired of her eternal EVS, went to a hypnotist and told him to make it so that everytime she starts droning on about her stupid cat, she'll automatically "shut up."

  2. She was the opposite of this guy but not the first person here to have mouth problems.

  3. I think I saw her eHarmony video. She looked like a real catch. The proverbial cat's meow!

  4. Thank you Dr Steve, I think your diagnosis may be correct here. As an alternate explanation lets look at the time I was on a very similar date. My date show no interest when I was talking about my pussy and I also immediately decided no blow job for him.

  5. Steve and TryN2Fly, y'all are my heroes! :) Thanks for the commentary.

  6. If you order the food, then she doesn't have to pay, because you ordered it. Its the logic.

  7. @L.Toledo: I believe this also falls under the rule of silent people can't pay.

  8. This comment has been removed by the author.

  9. ..... "Cat get your tongue" is what I think she was looking for.

  10. "Cat get your tongue" is what I think she was looking for.


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