Fireworked Up

Story Sent in by Wayne:

I tossed emails back and forth with Jamie and when the time came for us to plan a date, she invited me, over the phone, to "watch the fireworks from the roof" of her apartment building.

This wasn't anytime near the Fourth of July (it was winter, in fact) but she swore that that coming Saturday night there'd be fireworks in her town.

We enjoyed an early dinner out and as it grew dark, we made it to her apartment building roof, bundled up against the cold.

After an hour and a half of talking and waiting, it was pretty dark out and I asked her, "When are the fireworks supposed to start?"

"What fireworks?"

"The ones I came up here to see."

"I never said anything about fireworks."

"...yes you did."

"No, I didn't."

She absolutely, positively, 100% had mentioned fireworks. Multiple times. I was ready to bust out our emails as proof until I realized that she had asked me over the phone to come see the fireworks, not by email.

She denied over and over ever mentioning fireworks, and when I tried to kiss her, she pushed me away. So I went home without fireworks and without a desire for a second date. Bah humbug.


  1. This was her first test. If you came over, and fireworks just happened to spontaneously erupt over the skyline in the middle of winter, then you passed the first test, and can proceed to the next one.

    Because, you know, it makes perfect sense...

  2. KatieGirl has a pyrotechnic crew follow her around everywhere she goes, because fireworks must go off every time she kisses one of her random Match guys that she sees behind her boyfriend's back.


  3. @ Steve - Love the KatieGirl meme!

    Yet another case of a clueless OP leaving his poor date with EVS. Hello, "fireworks" is code for sex. It doesn't take Fellini to figure that one out. Then you berate her about "fireworks" and wonder why she won't kiss you....humm. EVS claims another victim.

  4. Who cares about fireworks? You are on the roof with her. Make your own. That said, this seems like a pretty uneventful bad date for this site.

  5. The latest outbreak of EVS claims another victim.

  6. OP's date promised fireworks and he wants to pull out his imaginary emails instead of his dick. They are waiting for you at Chumps Men's Sauna for some special retraining as clearly pussy is completely wasted on you.

  7. TryN2Fly, I adore you so much! And OP, geez...

  8. Big kiss to you too Tanette.......and a little inappropriate fondling.

  9. To the uninitiated, if they exist...

    Nevermind look it up.

  10. This comment has been removed by the author.

  11. Hmm I Googled EVS and there are several possibilities...

    I'll give the "uninitiated" a multiple choice:

    Extreme Velocity Sports
    Electric Vehicle(s)
    Eastern Vascular Society
    Eastern Video Systems
    Economic and Valuation Services
    Electro-Optical Viewing System
    Emergency Vehicle Services
    Employer Verification Service
    Empty Vagina Syndrome
    Endoscopic Variceal Sclerotherapy
    Engine Valve Springs
    Enhanced Voltage Stress
    Entertainment Vision Sensor
    Enumeration Verification System
    European Valuation Standards
    Exact Visible Set
    Exchange Virtual Server
    Exclusive Viewing Show
    Expected Value Score
    Extravehicular Suit
    Extreme Video Solutions
    Extreme Voltage Shutdown

    ... though I guess most of these still fit with all the comments here


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